FEED MY SHEEP

My Year in Pictures: 2011

2011-12-31T11:44:00.000-08:00

As the year winds to a close, I love to take a look back and remember the people, places and celebrations that have made life so amazing! Here is a visual trip down memory lane...

January

The past year and a half or so, I have been doing a ton of photo shoots for practice, fun, and now, my business. For Christmas 2010, I received a new lens for my Canon Rebel and was eager to try it out. The young lady in this photo is "Artemis", an enthusiastic and motivated model who has collaborated with me on many of shoots. For this shoot in particular, I borrowed multiple outfits from a Bay area boutique so that we could do our first fashion shoot together. Everything was going well until I realized I locked my keys in the car... while waiting for AAA to arrive, we decided to snap a few closeups! The rest of the day went on without further incident. We ended up shooting five outfits in six hours, in forty degree weather. Artemis never complained once! Did I mention she was enthusiastic (and possibly Alaskan)?

February

In February, I was lucky enough to be one of the photographers at Sacramento Fashion Week. The event was one of my highlights of the year! I met so many talented people and got to enjoy the glamor of runway designer fashion, up close and personal. This shot was taken backstage on the first night. Models everywhere were getting their hair and makeup done, touchups, getting fitted, dressed and donning their accessories. You'd be surprised how many were actually sewn into their garments, a la Olivia Newton John in Grease! And yes, for some that meant having butterflies sewn onto them. One of the side benefits of hanging with the models is picking up tips such as "to keep from falling down on the runway, spray hairspray on the bottom of your nylons so that your feet don't slip in your shoes." And now you know.

March

At the end of March, Gary and I kicked off the start of camping season and headed to Mendocino for a glorious get away weekend. The California coast is truly one of the natural treasures of the world! Gary and I both find our time in nature to be so refreshing, enjoyable and encouraging.

April

This is one of my favorite shots from a photo shoot with an aspiring model / musician named Jvion. I can be a bit apprehensive about shooting with male models, as (being a girl, myself) I don't feel I can provide much direction or insight about how to look manly in a photo! Maybe I should take up reading men's fashion magazines??? No worries with Jvion. He has a great personality and always has lots of ideas to incorporate into a photo shoot, including his experience in martial arts.

May

This image is from my first shoot with an agency model, Brian Francis from City Model Management, at the Vizcaya in downtown Sacramento. Have I mentioned that my year was full of photo shoots?

June

This bunch of special folks is the first small group that Gary and I participated in at Gateway Fellowship, before launching the one that we now lead. We were celebrating the very special occasion of Jim's 96th birthday! Jim is one of those people that within a short time became one of my favorite people in the whole world. I'm looking forward to celebrating his #97!

July

In July, I participated in a photo shoot at The Old Sugar Mill, a unique place in the Sacramento area. I snapped this pic which was eventually published in N Magazine as a finalist in their annual photo contest.

August

In August, we hosted a reunion BBQ for our friends from Jacob's Well, the special church plant that ran a couple of years when we first married and moved to Sacramento. This picture is us with a few of the youth that must have been about 11 or 12 when we started up the youth group back in the day! What a blessing to see them blossoming into amazing young adults.

September

On September 3rd, 2011, dreams came true when Gary's brother (known to many of you as "Bonus") married his sweetheart, Liz. I can't imagine a better, more well suited person for Bonus to spend his life with, and I am thrilled to call Liz not only friend, but sister!

October

Yep, our little Shih Tzu Billy is still amusing us with his antics. He's ancient now (11? 12?) but still finding new perches from which to observe the world around him. Life's tough when you're only eight inches tall! I usually find him curled up on some kind of cushion/blanket/pillow, but on this day in October he showed off a new preferred role: centerpiece!

November

We hosted Thanksgiving in Sacramento this year, and part of the weekend festivities were devoted to the creation of an application video to the Amazing Race! My husband and mother are hoping to take part as the first "in-law" team on the show! Wouldn't that be something? Keep your eyes peeled as they may be racing by you any day now!

December

Many thanks to my good friend Wendy St. Clair for taking some great portrait shots of Gary and I! Due to Gary and I both getting sick in December, we weren't able to get picture cards made up for family and friends, but now you can enjoy our cuteness right here on the blog! We've been married twelve and a half years now, and are just as in love as ever!

Joy in Praying for Others

2011-07-11T22:58:00.000-07:00

You’re making your way through the church lobby after a Sunday worship service when you see someone you know coming though the crowd in your direction. After you greet one another, your friend says, “I was hoping I’d catch you. I have a prayer request I want to share with you.”

What’s your reaction in that moment?

“Alright! It’s an opportunity to lift up someone’s need in prayer! This so totally ROCKS!”

“My prayer list is already too long… Let’s see if this request is important enough to make the cut.”

“I really care about this person, but I’m so busy right now. I really wish they’d have asked somebody else.”

Or if you’re like me…

“I hope I remember this later!”

If we were to follow the example of the Apostle Paul, our reaction would be closest to the first of these, as silly as it may sound. Paul found great joy in praying for others, asking God to intervene in their lives in order to accomplish His purposes. Take a look at Philippians 1:4-8.

In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.

It is right for me to feel this way about all of you, since I have you in my heart and, whether I am in chains or defending and confirming the gospel, all of you share in God’s grace with me. God can testify how I long for all of you with the affection of Christ Jesus.

Paul was a prisoner, and yet his affection for his brothers and sisters living in Philippi was so great that it brought him joy to pray for them. This joy certainly didn’t come from his circumstances. So from where did it come?

1. Joy in their shared history – Paul had been through hard things with these people. In Acts 16, we read about how Paul and Silas were jailed in Philippi. As the two missionaries were being run out of town by the magistrates, they visited the fledgling house church there one last time. That church was the one Paul later wrote these words to, once again jailed for the sake of the gospel. Paul honored their history together by praying for them with joy.

2. Joy in their shared standing in Christ – Paul recognized that these people he was praying for weren’t just any people. They belonged to the household of God, beloved children of the Almighty, co-heirs with Jesus Christ! He knew that God was at work in their lives, and that God would carry that work to completion. He knew they shared in God’s grace – with him. They were beloved just as he was beloved. What a joy it is to know that others experience the love of God just as I do! What a bond we share!

3. Joy in God’s love for them – Paul longed for these people “with the affection of Christ Jesus.” He was able to see them from God’s point of view. Shouldn’t we, as God’s people, care about the things God cares about? God takes joy in answering the prayers of His people. Should we not also take joy in lifting their prayer needs to God?

And so, I am convicted. I want to be more like Paul in this, finding joy in lifting the needs of my brothers and sisters to our Father. I want to pray as Paul prayed, that their love would abound more and more, that they would have knowledge and discernment, and that they would remain pure and blameless until the day of Christ (Phil. 1:9-11).

Speaking of which, do you ever notice that when Paul prays for people, he never prays that they would find relief from their bunions, find a new job, or get along better with their sister? He always prays for things like “abounding love,” “depth of insight,” and “the fruit of righteousness.” I wonder if we prayed these things for one another how it might change our level of excitement about praying for others. I wonder how it might change our lives…

But that’s another post for another time. For now, let us pray for one another with all joy!

Now, remind me again what you wanted prayer for...

Philippians Series

2011-07-11T22:11:00.000-07:00

My Small Group Community has been studying Paul’s epistle to the Philippians this summer, and I’ve really enjoyed it! Then again, I’ve been the one doing the teaching, so there are no guarantees that others have felt the same. Nonetheless, our time in Philippians has yielded a number of applications that hit close to home in a good way.

Particularly striking to me is the theme of joy in Philippians. Paul uses “joy” or “rejoice” eleven different times in the four chapters of Philippians. He points out things that any Christian can find joy in, no matter what one’s circumstances in life may be. I’d like to share these observations on joy in a series of posts here. It’s a new project, ripe with potential! Let’s see if I can carry it through to completion…

Are You Writing?

2011-07-07T23:09:00.000-07:00

“And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.”

-- Hebrews 10:24-25

I’m writing this because a thirteen-year-old called my cell phone at ten o’clock last night. Had he not done so, I would surely be doing something else. But he called. So, here I am.

This requires some explanation. Let me back up.

Several weeks ago, following a sermon on investing in eternal things, my Ever-Lovin’ Wife (ELW) led our small group in a prayer exercise. We were to ask God if there was something He wanted us to invest in, either with our time or our money, and then to listen for His response. I closed my eyes, took a deep breath, and began to pray silently.

Instantly, I knew what God wanted me to do. He wanted me to write. Devotionals, blogging, curriculum, sermons…my books. He wanted me to invest in writing for Him.

I felt anxious, agitated. “But God,” I replied, “I don’t have time to write. If I were to do that, I’d have to give up some of my relaxation time. I’d have to watch less TV! You know how much TV means to me!”

Looking back on it, this reply seems somewhat childish and awfully silly. But in that moment, it seemed true. I had been convicted by the Holy Spirit to do something that I had no desire to do, and I felt angry that God would even ask. By God’s grace, I shared this experience with my small group and asked them to pray that God would change my heart.

Weeks went by, and despite my small group community’s prayers and encouragement, still no writing. But I could sense God softening my heart toward the idea. I went from loathing at the thought of it, to begrudging acceptance that it was a good idea, to some sort of vaguely eager anticipation of it. I even came up with a plan for how writing might occur. Each night after putting ELW to bed (I’m still tucking her in after twelve years of marriage), I would spend the next hour writing. It was specific, measurable, and not overly ambitious. In other words, it was perfect.

Except for one thing. I didn’t do it.

Enter my thirteen-year-old friend, Tyler Crane. Tyler is in the 8^th grade guys small group that I lead at church. Last weekend several folks from our youth group, including Tyler and me, attended a local Summer Camp in the foothills. There, we heard a message on Ephesians 5:15-16 about making the most of the short time we have on earth, spending it doing things with eternal ramifications. Again, God brought my writing to mind. I mentioned this conviction with my 8^th grade guys, both during our car ride home and at youth group this week, in an effort to model transparency. But God had more in store.

After youth group, Tyler came up to me and said, “So, your plan is to write after your wife goes to bed each night?”

“That’s right,” I said.

“So, what time does she go to bed?"

“Oh, between 9:30 and 9:45 I suppose.”

"So…if I called you at 10:00, you should be writing when I called, right?”

I hesitated. I could see where this was going. “Yeah, I guess that’s right.”

“Okay. I’ll call you tonight.”

And he did. At 10pm. On the dot.

I answered, “Hi, Tyler.”

Three words came back in response: “Are you writing?”

That was last night. I did write last night, though I was working on a Seminary project, and as my wonderful ELW reminded me this evening, God did not tell me He wants me to invest more time in getting my homework done.

And so tonight, I’m writing this.

I’m writing this to say that I now have a real life example of what the author of Hebrews means when he commands us to “spur one another on.” Spurring is aggressive encouragement. Help that can’t be ignored. A ten o’clock phone call to find out if you’re writing. That’s being spurred on. That’s love.

I’m writing this to say that while God filled the powder keg of inspiration and conviction that has led me to write, it was Tyler Crane who lit the match. (Tonight, I was three paragraphs in when he called. I don’t know what I’ll be in the midst of tomorrow night, but I know I’ll be writing something!)

I’m writing this to ask you if someone in your life needs this kind of spurring on. Maybe you need it yourself. For me, being spurred on is a nightly phone call and a simple question. What would it look like for you, or for the ones you love?

Because, if we’re honest, we all have times in our lives when what we really need is for someone to call us and ask, “Are you writing?”

Enough is Enough

2011-05-07T13:51:00.000-07:00

“What should we do then?” the crowd asked.
John answered, “Anyone who has two shirts should share with the one who has none, and anyone who has food should do the same.”
Luke 3:10-11

Brad led a dorm bible study that I attended during my first year in college. He shared a house just off campus with a few other Christian guys, and he and his housemates ministered to many of the neighborhood’s homeless men. After several months of doing this, it became known in the homeless community that Brad’s house was a place you could go for help.

One chilly winter night, a homeless man showed up on Brad’s doorstep asking if the guys might have a blanket to spare, since he had nothing to shield him from the night air. Brad and his housemates searched the house, but they had given away all of the spare blankets they usually kept on hand for such occasions. In fact, there was only one spare blanket in the whole house: Brad’s childhood blanket, affectionately known as Brad’s "binkie."

Brad had loved his binkie as long as he could remember. He had grown up with it. His binkie had brought him comfort as a child, and even now as a young adult, it still stirred fond memories in his heart.

But that night, someone needed his binkie more than he did.

Brad carried his binkie to the front door, gave it one last hug, and handed it to the homeless man on the porch.

How much do you need to have before you have enough to share with others? According to John the Baptist, if you own two outfits, you’re ready to start giving!

For most of us, this standard seems unachievable. We are much more likely to hold our possessions with a clutching claw rather than with an open palm. But it doesn’t have to be this way. By the grace and power of the Holy Spirit living inside of us, we can learn to trust God with our possessions, even when that means giving them away.

Even when it means giving away our binkie.

Spring, v. 2.0

2011-02-12T17:46:00.000-08:00

For Christmas this past year, the one thing I reeeeealllly wanted was a new lens for my Canon D-SLR. Specifically, the 50 mm 1.8 prime lens. (I know this probably won't mean anything except to other photographers) Fortunately, Santa was kind enough to hear my shameless hint-dropping! Now that spring has dropped in to California for a sneak preview, I was excited to get to "get to know" my new lens and have some fun with the shallow depth of field. So without further ado, I bring you, "My front yard, at f/2.0"

My Year in Pictures: 2010

2010-12-25T16:39:00.000-08:00

In January, we took a refreshing weekend get-away up to Shasta, and I got to play in the snow while Gary took pictures from the warmth of indoors! Looking back, that weekend felt like the turning point in our lives, closing the chapter on grief and survival, and looking forward to joy and hope.

In February, we took advantage of beautiful weather for a hike out towards Auburn. We discovered a path off the main trail that led to a little alcove with this view. The perfect place for lunch, and one of my favorite hiking finds yet!

In March, we attended the St. Patrick's Day Parade in Old Sac. We'd attended this parade during our first year of marriage, so it definitely brought out a lot of those "we're back home!" feelings. This was my favorite float, with the saddest girl scout troop ever! I don't know why they are so miserable, but they just make me giggle! Don't they look as if they are being punished? Poor kids.

In April, we were invited to spend the weekend with friends (from our old Fair Oaks small group) in Lake Tahoe. There was quite a bit of snow, but we managed to find a stretch of shore to walk along. It was the first chance we had to catch up since moving away, and it was a sweet time.

In May, we had the joy of celebrating with our good friends Eric and Stacy, as they officially tied the knot! I was overwhelmed with joy, as these two both are like family to me, and are deserving of such rich blessing together. The icing on the cake was that we now share wedding anniversaries!

June brought the first ever Fam-Bam camping trip. We took Molly with us to Fallen Leaf Lake, which is a little gem hidden just a couple miles away from Lake Tahoe. There was swimming, hiking, and bacon, in that order (though not all in one day!).

In July, I spotted this tabbycat snoozing peacefully in our backyard. I snapped this pic, which I later entered in the annual N magazine photo contest, resulting in my first publication! Many thanks, mystery cat!

In August, we fulfilled our dream to camp at Crater Lake, OR. In this picture, Gary is pointing to the peak to which we had hiked the day before. Oh, and yes, we know that we are dorks!

September was our trip to Heavenly Hills Family Camp, in Twain Harte. Our former pastor from Jacob's Well was coming down from Idaho to be the camp speaker, and a few of us decided (separately) to pop in and surprise him! If you know us at all, you've probably heard us talk about this church and what a special family we were. To reunite and share what God has been doing in each of us really felt like a holy blessing from God. What a gift, to love such brothers and sisters. I will never forget that weekend.

With October came our annual Halloween tradition, "Candy Poker Night". After years of hosting the event, Gary was proud to finally be a winner of said candy poker, even defeating Ron Burgundy to the last tootsie roll.

In November, we thought we'd be clever and do our own family pictures in a local photography studio. We got our traditional classy images, but I couldn't leave without having a little fun... here's one that didn't make the Christmas card!

In December, we had an early "Holly Molly Christmas" celebration so that we could enjoy Christmas together before Molly headed to Concord to meet up with family. After we all exchanged gifts, Molly and I headed to the kitchen to make breakfast. Baking together on my days off has been one of our special traditions over this past year, and we have discovered some yummy new (low sugar!) recipes. Christmas day was a special treat: orange chocolate pancakes. Mmmmmmmmm!!!!

Why We Proclaim Such Foolishness

2010-11-11T14:37:00.000-08:00

"For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God... Brothers, think of what you were when you were called. Not many of you were wise by human standards; not many were influential; not many were of noble birth. But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. He chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things—and the things that are not—to nullify the things that are, so that no one may boast before him. It is because of him that you are in Christ Jesus, who has become for us wisdom from God—that is, our righteousness, holiness and redemption."

-- 1 Corinthians 1:18, 26-30

No matter what we do, the world will continue to see our faith as foolishness.

There are a number of contemporary Christian apologists working hard to engage the dominant culture on behalf of Christ. Some, like Ravi Zacharias, strive to earn respect for the Christian worldview in the marketplace of ideas. They want the world to see our faith as reasonable, rational, and logical. Others, like Brian McLaren, are working to demonstrate how our ancient faith can appeal to post-modern concerns. They want the world to see our faith as relevant, powerful, and authentic.

Both of these groups are motivated by a genuine zeal for Christ and a desire to extend His Kingdom, just as we are commanded to do. But it seems to me, we must acknowledge that no matter how well we reason and argue and demonstrate and appeal, the vast majority of the world will continue to see our message as foolishness, choosing to perish rather than to accept it.

So what, then? Do we cease to put forth our message because most will reject it? Certainly not! As this passage goes on to state, through this message of the cross, God calls the lowly and the weak and the base in the eyes of the eyes of the world to be saved. It is for the sake of these that we continue to proclaim God's message of reconciliation.

Thus, none of us who are saved can boast. God did not save us because of our worthiness, but rather, He saved us in spite of our unworthiness. We who would proclaim His message to others need to keep this in mind, because it applies to us as well. God does not save others because of our persuasive words. Often, He saves others in spite of them.

For Kathy!

2010-10-09T09:53:00.001-07:00

Harvest Fruit Muffins

2 cups all-purpose flour
1/4 cup firmly packed brown sugar
2 teaspoons baking powder
2 teaspoons ground cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1/4 teaspoon ground ginger
1/4 teaspoon ground nutmeg
1/8 teaspoon salt
1/2 cup milk
1/2 cup vegetable oil
1 medium banana, mashed
1 large egg, lightly beaten
1 medium apple, cored and chopped
1/2 cup raisins

1. Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Spray 12 cup muffin pan (or loaf pan) with cooking spray, set aside.

2. In a medium bowl, combine flour, brown sugar, baking powder, cinnamon, baking soda, ginger, nutmeg, and salt. Mix well, set aside.

3. In a small bowl, combine milk, oil, banana, and egg. Add milk mixture to flour mixture. Stir until just combined. Add apple and raisins.

4. Divide batter among muffin cups (or pour into loaf pan), filling until 2/3 full. Bake until tops are firm and golden, about 20 minutes (or longer for loaf).

Stacy and Eric

2010-06-26T09:52:00.000-07:00

One of the highlights of this past month was the opportunity to spend some time with old friends Stacy and Eric, who were back in town for their long-awaited wedding! Stacy and I were college roomies back in the day at USC; she was actually the first person I met after moving in to Marks Hall freshman year (don't ask her about the story, she apparently has no memory of it!). We headed to downtown Sacramento for an engagement photo shoot. I don't think we could have had more fun, and I was thrilled with how their pictures turned out. Aren't they cute together?

The Trinity on Display

2010-06-17T14:36:00.000-07:00

I shared this with a couple of 8th-graders today, and I think it's interesting enough to share here as well.

We were talking about the Trinity, and how the term never actually appears in the Scriptures, though the concept is clearly taught. In fact, there's one particular scene in the Bible in which the "Three-Personed" nature of God is undeniably on display: the baptism of Jesus.

Here's how it's presented in Luke 3:21-22.

When all the people were being baptized, Jesus was baptized too. And as he was praying, heaven was opened and the Holy Spirit descended on him in bodily form like a dove. And a voice came from heaven: "You are my Son, whom I love; with you I am well pleased."

In this one scene, we see all three Divine Persons. God the Son is the One being baptized, God the Holy Spirit descends in a visible manifestation that resembles a dove, and God the Father speaks audibly from heaven. This is a simple, clear, and quite beautiful depiction of the three distinct Persons in our "Three-in-One" God.

So keep that one in your back pocket, just in case you need to blow someone's mind.

It's not a picnic, without...

2010-05-01T17:48:00.000-07:00

So the hubbo and I had a nice romantic picnic planned down by the river a couple of weeks ago, when who should decide to crash our party:

Skunks! Yep, we were right in the middle of the foraging area for three little stinkers! They didn't seem to mind us much, but we were verrrrrryy careful to mind them! Unsurprisingly, I whipped out my camera for some spontaneous nature photography:

Book Review: The Reason for God by Tim Keller

2010-04-30T14:58:00.000-07:00

In The Reason for God: Belief in Age of Skepticism, Tim Keller addresses the most common questions and doubts of skeptics that he has encountered, and offers a number of reasons to believe the truth of the Gospel. As the founding pastor of Redeemer Presbyterian Church in Manhattan, Keller is no stranger to the urban, post-modern, intellectual skeptic. It is clearly this sort of person Keller has in mind as he provides gracious answers to pressing doubts.

Before addressing these doubts, Keller presents a most interesting introduction in which he introduces his working premise: that every doubt is based on a set of alternate beliefs. He uses the example of someone who opposes Christianity because it seems exclusionary. This person argues that there can’t be just one true religion, all the while never realizing that their statement is really an alternate belief that requires faith. It can’t be proven empirically. It is not universally accepted. This “reasoning” is just as much a position based on faith as the Christian’s is, if not more so. These sorts of embedded leaps of faith reappear throughout.

After the introduction, the rest of the book’s first half is devoted to addressing the questions and doubts of skeptics. Here, Keller is at his best. It is easy to imagine him deftly answering challenges at one of his post-sermon Q&A sessions at Redeemer. I especially appreciated his analogies, many of which I will hold onto and use in my own ministry for years to come. For instance, in his chapter entitled, “Christianity is a Straitjacket,” Keller addresses the widely-held fallacy that real human freedom is a maximal lack of constraint, that the truly free person is the one who decides for herself what is right and what is wrong without having morality imposed upon her by another. Keller uses two analogies that are simple, yet brilliant, to prove that freedom is not simply a lack of constraint. First, he presents a musician who has given up hours upon hours in order to practice and perfect his craft. He was most certainly constrained by such diligence, but because of it, he is now free to express himself musically in ways he would never have been able to had he been “free” from constraint. Then, Keller turns his attention to an even more universal analogy, that of love. He writes: “If you want the ‘freedom’ of love – the fulfillment, security, sense of worth that it brings – you must limit your freedom in many ways…To experience the joy and freedom of love, you must give up your personal autonomy.” Anyone who has experienced a love relationship will be able to relate to this “trade” of personal freedom for intimacy, and will likely agree that it is worth the constraint.

The second half of the book changes focus, from answering doubts to presenting “sufficient reasons for believing.” Keller asks his reader to “put on Christianity like a pair of spectacles and look at the world with it. See what power it has to explain what we know and see.” This tour of the Christian worldview includes a review of various evidences that point to the existence of God, a discussion of moral obligation as a divine fingerprint, an explanation of the fallen world we see around as through the lens of sin, and a presentation of the Gospel.

This section did not seem as strong to me as the book’s first half did. Nevertheless, I thought the chapter delineating between religion and the Gospel was very well done. Keller writes: “The primary difference is that of motivation. In religion, we try to obey the divine standards out of fear… In the gospel, the motivation is one of gratitude for the blessing we have already received because of Christ.” Here, we hear an echo of an earlier chapter, denouncing fanaticism as modern-day Pharisaism. Moralist religion is not the Gospel of Jesus Christ. By making this distinction, Keller gives himself ground to criticize the abuses of Christian “religion” in the world even as he advocates forcefully for the Gospel.

On the whole, I was very impressed with Keller’s book. He speaks powerfully, yet gently, and he addresses questions that people are actually asking. The first half seems to me especially powerful for equipping believers to address these questions as well. I would be interested to hear the perspective of a seeker or skeptic who has read the book, but it seems to me the arguments would resonate. Based on clarity, utility, and provocation of thought, this is the best book I have read in any of my classes this semester.

Happy Easter!

2010-04-03T16:53:00.001-07:00

St. Paddy's 2010

2010-03-15T20:46:00.000-07:00

This past Saturday was the annual St. Patrick's Day Parade, held in Old Sacramento.

It was a grand time for all things Irish!

(and not so Irish)

It's not St. Patrick's Day without some Dancin' Girls. I soooo love the big fake curly hair!

... and more Dancin' Girls! These girls have to concentrate harder, because they are dancing on a moving float... whoa~!

I absolutely adored the Girl Scouts float. Check out these proud dads!

But these must be the saddest Girl Scouts ever! Awww... =(

Doesn't this bring back high school (whether you cheered, or not)?

Nothing short of fearless:

Hope you can join us next time!

Life these days...

2010-03-02T11:51:00.000-08:00

Hi friends, I've gotten the hint that a few of you may be interested in an update on us Westons. I'm home sick from work today, too ill to do my job, cough cough, but not too incapacitated to write, so hopefully this will work out well!

By now most of you know that we are living in Sacramento and Gary is doing full time school. We made the move at the end of last October, after four months of house hunting in the Sacramento area. The timing aligned fairly well: our housing in Concord was no longer available, Molly was heading out on her mission trip, and Gary's fall semester was starting up at the Sacramento campus of Western Seminary.

We found a home in the Natomas area that looked like a great deal - unfortunately we were outbid in cash and had to start the search over. We ended up purchasing a 2 bed 2 bath home, also in Natomas. What with the housing market crash, combined with our saved down payment, our mortgage is less than half of what we were paying for our first home. That is definitely a blessing while Gary is in full time school! We're probably a couple of miles from the apartment that was our first newlywed home, and the house we had owned prior to the World Race. We are adjusting to the smaller living quarters and looking forward to summertime BBQs on the gorgeous back patio. I just last weekend unpacked the last box in the house - a victory in and of itself! (Our garage will be the next project to tackle...) Our Shih Tzu, Billy, has a chair set up by the front window where he loves to lay and watch the neighborhood goings-on. We are walking distance from the power line easement that runs through the neighborhood, and it's got a good paved trail that is perfect for walking the dog on good weather days. We have met several of our neighbors and are developing some good relationships. The neighborhood is incredibly diverse, which I love, and most of the residents have been here over ten years.

We have found a church in the area that we've been attending: Gateway Fellowship, pastored by Mike Phillips, which has been a good place for us to land and get involved. Gary and I have been enjoying a Sunday afternoon adult small group, led by the pastor, and Molly has been getting involved with the thriving young adult ministry. A fun fact for us is that Pastor Mike had been close to our former pastor, Darrin Sligar, during the Jacob's Well days. In that sense, Gateway feels like extended family that we are just now getting to know. Gateway is a Christian and Missionary Alliance church, with a high priority placed on supporting missions. Another Gateway distinctive is their commitment to the Spanish speaking community. English and Spanish services are held simultaneously, and once a month the two congregations merge to share a powerful time of communion and worship!

Molly continues to be a valuable part of our lives and we feel so blessed to have her in our home. She first moved in with us a year and a half ago for a summer of discipleship, and since then we have grown into a family. She had spent over a year preparing for the mission field and departed last September for missions team training in Mexico. During the training, she had to unexpectedly return home for health reasons, and though she recovered quickly was told by her organization that she would not be allowed to return on that particular trip. Since then, the program she had signed up for has been discontinued.

A career on the mission field, hopefully in Africa, continues to be Molly's passion and goal, and we are praying with her about when, where, and how that will take place. In the meantime, she is optimizing her time at home by studying at a local community college for her EMT Basic certificate. She has been extremely diligent in her studies and is at the top of her class! I am excited for her that once she does return to the mission field, she will be equipped with skills in the medical field that I'm sure will be a blessing to many.

Gary is now in the latter half of his M. Div. degree program through Western Seminary. He is currently studying church history, theology, and evangelism, and at any given moment will be found reading yet another book! With the move back to Sacramento, he's had the opportunity to jump back into a weekly men's breakfast he had participated in five years ago. The group has shifted somewhat, but the core members are going strong! Gary will also soon have the opportunity for some part-time work as the Driver's Training school he worked at in Concord is expanding into the Sacramento region. I know you are all jealous of those high school kids that get to do their training in the bright blue DriversEd.com mini-cooper!

Overall, life feels as if it's whizzing by... It's frustrating at times to still be in the middle of transition and wonder where we will be two years from now, but we are surrounded by so many blessings that I have to just remind myself to keep taking it one day at a time. One thing is for sure, we're not bored!

First Hike of the Year

2010-02-19T07:32:00.000-08:00

Last weekend, Gary and I took full advantage of the beautiful (65 and sunny) weather we were enjoying to get out on the trails. Hiking is one of our "things", and winter seems oh so long when we're cooped up in the house. This is the first hike we've done since I bought my D-SLR, so of course I was more than excited to try it out on the trail. So, I grabbed my camera, and Gary found us a great new trail in the Auburn area that leads us down to the middle fork of the American River.

Even though it's still February, spring is obviously pushing winter aside with full force. I couldn't get enough of the budding trees that lined the first part of the trail. In the picture below, I love the sense of motion as the tree branch "comes at you":

A little further up the trail, these leaves are already budding. To see the sun backlighting the buds brings back that glorious sensation of the sun on my face.

About 4/5 of the way down the trail, we snuck down the side of the hill and found THE perfect lunch spot. This is my new favorite place; surrounded by lush ferns and moss, a rushing creek at your feet with waterfalls bookending the site. There's a little ledge along one hill where you can sit and watch the water rush by. A little piece of heaven.

This next pic is kinda weird, I'm warning you now. When we arrived at the bottom of the hill, we discovered that a large swath of riverbed had clearly been underwater and just recently dried up. River rocks were either covered with sediment or decorated with bright green filaments of algae. I couldn't get over how similar the algae looked to hair, and how the rocks looked like the tops of heads. It was bizarre stepping across them and waiting for one to turn up and blink at me, as if out of a Harry Potter movie.

This was the view after we concluded our descent: beautiful, open, free, so quiet and peaceful. I often feel that these times in nature move my heart to bring me the closest to God. This is His handiwork; He is the one who invented these beautiful places that give me such joy.

2009...what a year!

2009-12-20T21:43:00.000-08:00

1) What did you do in 2009 that you’d never done before?

Got a job that required my college degree (finally!). Fasted for six days. Attended a sunrise Easter service. Went to an American Idol concert. Moved back to Sacramento. Actively pursued friendships with our neighbors.

2) Did you keep your New Year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

I didn't really make resolutions so much as goals for the year, and I feel that I was fairly successful. Gary and I went on our first overnight backpacking trip (it was awesome). I've been closer to family, spent a lot more time with them on the phone and in person. I read a lot of books, including completing my through-the-Bible reading plan.

3) Did anyone close to you give birth?

Wow... this was indeed the year of babies! Many of our friends brought little bundles of joy into the world this past year. It's been so fun to celebrate with them! And even more are coming next year!

4) Did anyone close to you die?

Bev Roseberry left us this past year. Though I didn't know her as well as some of my friends did, there was no doubt that she'd made a great impact on a great many lives.

5) What countries did you visit?

Does Oregon count? =) I had the joy of setting up a successful Mexico mission for the Fair Oaks Global Outreach team, but wasn't a part of that mission team. We did, however, enlist as leaders for AIM's summer 2010 high school mission trips. Hopefully next summer we will be in Uganda!

6) What would you like to have in 2010 that you lacked in 2009?

See previous question: a return to Africa! To get plugged in to a Sacramento church family. Also, a bit of time somewhere to rest and dream would be nice. 2009 was intense!

7) What date(s) from 2009 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

In early January 2009, we were stunned to learn of our imminent departure from the church where Gary had been working as youth pastor. That day was an unfortunate collision with the "business" end of ministry. It also turned the page to a new, healthier, chapter of our lives. So yeah, memorable.

8) What was your biggest achievement of the year?

I am very proud of my return into full time work; I was very apprehensive about the changes this would bring to our lives, but I have done my best and have been blessed in our new situation. The great amount of emotional healing and forgiveness that has occurred this past year has been surprising.

9) Did you suffer illness or injury?

Not physically, though the heartache of the previous year was brought to a climax.

10) What was the best thing you bought?

Our new house! What a joy to return "home" to Sacramento, and to be able to own a home again.

11) Whose behavior merited celebration?

I continue to be blessed, inspired, and challenged by the love and faithfulness that Molly has displayed in numerous situations this past year. Most recently, she brought lunch, warm clothing, and a copy of the Message to a homeless man she had befriended the week before, all of her own accord. She is really living a life of love.

12) Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

What can I say here? The life I had was shattered by others' choices. All one can do is grieve the losses and be grateful for the gains I'm discovering.

13) Where did most of your money go?

We invested our savings into the purchase of our new home. Other than that, we've put most of our money into paying off our van, and contributing towards missions.

14) What did you get really, really, really excited about?

Taking a whole week off work, and coming to Minnesota for a White Christmas with Gary's family. Awesome!

15) What songs will always remind you of 2009?

Halo, by Beyonce, and Mad World, by Adam Lambert.

16) Compared to this time last year, are you:

Wiser? Indeed.
Healthier? Emotionally, yes.
Richer? Relationally and experientially... definitely!

17) What do you wish you’d done more of?

Prayed.

18) What do you wish you’d done less of?

Cried.

19) How did you spend Christmas?

With Gary's family in Minnesota. I love them so much!

20) Did you fall in love in 2009?

There's no new love in my life, but better than that, I am falling even more in love with my sweet husband in new ways.

21) What was your favorite blog post that you wrote?

Looking Back on 2008, which this post is based on. I've reflected on that post many times over this past year.

22) What were your favorite TV programs?

America's Next Top Model (still terribly fierce! or should I say, fiercely terrible!), So You Think You Can Dance, and Glee (at least, up until the adulterous season finale).

23) Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?

Hate? No. I've been deeply disappointed by a few individuals' choices, but that only leads to regret over what might have otherwise been.

24) What was the best book you read?

The Prodigal God, by Timothy Keller, and Crazy Love, by Francis Chan, have been thought provoking and potentially life-changing (only time will tell, right?). In terms of fun reading, I finally jumped on the Harry Potter bandwagon and have enjoyed the first novel so far.

25) What was your greatest musical discovery?

This year's season of American Idol was fun, inspiring, and let to great family memories. We took Molly to the concert tour this past summer for her birthday, and had a blast.

26) What did you want and get?

Believe it or not, I got everything I wanted but didn't get last year! (Answers. A coffee bean grinder. Cute brown shoes.) Also, a good camera for pursuing my photography. Plus, a good job, and a home of our own.

27) What did you want and not get?

Honestly, I'm pretty content right now. There are a few things I could use (new winter clothes, home furnishings), but the greatest unfulfilled desire of my heart is to see Molly living out her call on the mission field in Africa. Hopefully God will open the doors for that to happen in 2010.

28) What was your favorite film of this year?

Up, and The Blind Side. Both terrific and inspiring movies.

29) What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

I turned 32 this year, and celebrated with Gary and Molly by enjoying a fondue dinner at The Melting Pot, followed by picking out my present (an iPod!) at Best Buy.

30) Which celebrity/public figure did you like the most?

I don't know if Francis Chan fits this category, but he is an author/speaker who I have been greatly encouraged by. He is the pastor at my parents' church, Cornerstone Simi, and I listen to his sermon podcasts almost daily. I really identify with his heart to love God with passion, obedience and in truth.

31) How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2009?

"Social Work Professional". This year, I couldn't dress myself everyday in T-shirts from old youth group camps. I had to save those for the weekends! Turns out I clean up pretty nicely, though!

32) What kept you sane?

My new job. Definitely. It has been so healthy to pour my energy into a job in which I am helping people every day, using and developing my skills, and supporting my family. I never could have predicted how life-giving this would be.

33) Who did you miss?

Friendships through our church that faded away after our/their departure.

34) Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2009.

Life consists of different seasons, and that's not only ok, but a good thing.

35) What did you gain this year?

Healing. Peace. Confidence.

36) What did you lose this year?

I lost a fair amount of faith in "church", as might be expected. I'm getting ready to try again, though. I also feel that a sense of the youth ministry family was lost through the dissolution of Youth Specialties as we knew it.

37) Who was the best new person you met?

I've met some really cool people through my job this year. For example, one of my clients is a tiny woman with Downs Syndrome who lives on her own, maintains a beautifully clean and homey apartment, works a job, and completely dominates at Special Olympics. She loves her life and always inspires me to just go for it.

38) Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.

You are the one
Who has saved us
You are the one
Who forgave us
You are the one who has come
And is coming again
To make it alright
Oh, to make it alright
You’re the remedy
Oh, in us
You’re the remedy
-Remedy, David Crowder

Deja Vu

2009-10-11T11:13:00.000-07:00

As part of our moving process, I've been going through all the boxes we've had stored in various closets. One such box contained a stack of papers and mementos I've been saving since childhood.

While going through it, I was shocked and delighted to come across a postcard from Germany that someone (it might have been my dad, but neither one of us remembers for sure) had given me, and for some reason I kept all these years. The back is blank, but the front has a picturesque scene that looked remarkably familiar. I ran to the computer and scrolled through the pictures from our time in Germany during the World Race in 2006.

Yep, I've been there! What are the odds?

Not in MY house!

2009-10-10T12:31:00.000-07:00

Since July, we've probably visited three dozen different houses before landing on our new home. I always looked with camera in hand, to record the good, the bad, and the ugly. It's always interesting to see the personal touches people add to their homes. So, here's a photo blog to share some of our most memorable moments from the hunt.

Who wouldn't want a stairway to nowhere?

...or a mural of parrotfish, quite literally?

Who wants an indoor garden?

As Gary investigated this skylight, I couldn't help but imagine an alien abduction!

After years of cigarette smoking indoors, evidence was captured in the stained walls. (If this was the damage to the paint, I can't imagine what your lungs would look like!)

This pic is one of my faves: isn't so much about the house, but capturing a beautiful moment.

It was definitely fun to look, but I am more excited about the home that will be ours. One more week until we move!

Destination: Uganda!

2009-10-02T18:06:00.000-07:00

I'm excited to announce that next summer, Gary, Molly, and I will be co-leading a youth mission trip to Uganda with Adventures in Missions. The trip is part of AIM's Ambassador program, designed for students ages 14-18 who want to serve God on trips that vary in length from one to four weeks. We will be ministering in Busia, Uganda (right across the border from Kenya) from June 30, 2010 to July 30, 2010.

According to AIM's website:

Much of the ministry will be will be in partnership with Helping Hands Ministry. The team will be ministering at a school for orphans. There will be opportunities to provide friendship, bible studies, education and the gospel to the children. In addition to the children, you will have a chance to minister to young adults in the area with outreach events working alongside Ugandans who are trying to reach their peers.

The team will assist and learn how to best minister with and to the people of Uganda. There may also be opportunities for the team to work with local churches "in the bush" once a week. The opportunities to join God in what He is doing in Uganda will be many and full of variety.

When I left Africa in 2006, I felt as if I left a piece of my heart there. I have been asking God since that time if it might be in His will for me to someday return and love on orphans in His name. I am thrilled for this opportunity, and am looking forward to four weeks of discipling teenagers while serving together.

AIM is accepting applications now for students who would like to participate in this trip. If you would like to join us, we would love to have you! Click here for more information about the trip!

Molly Update

2009-09-27T10:09:00.000-07:00

So in case you haven't heard, Molly departed for her mission trip this past Wednesday, September 23rd. She left out of San Francisco at 6 am (!) and arrived in McAllen, Texas later that day. AIM staff met participants at the airport and drove them across the border to their home for the next two months.

During the training portion of their trip, the entire Novas group will be living and working out The Gateway, AIM's mission base in Matamoros, Mexico. Molly is bunking with 26 girls in a giant room. She reports that it is beautiful and raining right now. The day after arriving, the participants began a two day period of solitude to focus on prayer and connecting with God. They were given reading and journaling assignments. Molly has found this time challenging, but valuable.

On December 1, Molly will be flying to Swaziland with her teammates Jessica, Lila, Katie, Bryan, and John. They will be working with orphans at the Nsoko care point through next May.

Here are a couple of team pics from their training camp last month:

You can follow along with Molly's journey at her blog by here: http://mollymcrae.myadventures.org/.

Also, here is an address where you can send letters while the team is in Mexico:

Molly McRae
C/O: Tag Thompson
Adventures in Missions
6000 Wellspring Trail
Gainesville, GA 30506

They will keep the letters there and as staff goes down to Mexico they will take any mail which comes in. Make sure to send a message of encouragement!

700 Pelican Way

2009-09-09T06:44:00.000-07:00

Yep, that's going to be our new address! We're moving back to Sacramento this fall to be closer to Gary's seminary, where he will be studying full time for the next two years. After a looooong round of searching, we found this little house that will be perfect for the next chapter of our lives!

At this stage, we have made an offer, which has been accepted. We are hoping that escrow goes quickly, but right now it looks like we will probably be moving in early October. 700 Pelican Way is a two bed - two bath home in the Natomas area, off of Northgate. It's not huge, but it's got a lot of personality.

There's a huge fireplace in the living room, for those chilly winter evenings:

There's a gorgeous brick porch out back (complete with ceiling fan!), perfect for grilling when the weather's good!

There's also a little bay window in the kitchen, and a cedar lined closet in the master:

The second bedroom is cute, but slated for re-painting (sorry, mom & dad!):

The backyard is the perfect size for our little dog to run around in:

Oh, and have I mentioned the best part? Once we're moved in, you're invited! =)

Garden Variety

2009-08-23T20:51:00.000-07:00

I've been continuing to enjoy my camera (Canon Rebel xsi), and have really appreciated the feedback and encouragement you've given on my past photo blogs. I never intentionally set out to do closeups, but these are the details that grab my attention and delight. I hope you enjoy the same intricate beauty that originally caught my eye. So (Brandon), here's round two!

A perfect heart:

Spiderweb with water droplets:

Translucent rose petals:

This little guy took off when he tired of having his picture taken!

Rainbow in my own backyard:

A little photo editing goes a long way:

Monochromatic Melancholy

2009-08-01T09:39:00.000-07:00

Yesterday marked my first attempt to shoot monochrome with the new camera. I am extremely pleased with how these turned out. I hope you enjoy them as well.

The first is one of my favorites. I love the cascading effect of the petals going out of focus to the edges.

This next one is best at full-size. I found my eye wandering over the edge of each petal; for me it had the same entrancing feeling as watching ripples move across water, or waves on the ocean.

I don't believe I could have posed these four roses any more attractively:

This final pictures is Gary's favorite, a timeless rosebud.

I would greatly appreciate your feedback... do any of these pictures speak to you?

Chateau St. Jean Photo-Blog

2009-07-12T10:41:00.000-07:00

Following our 4th of July parade and pancake breakfast, we meandered down the road to visit the Chateau St. Jean winery in Sonoma. This winery has one of the most stunningly beautiful grounds I've ever seen (a fact not unnoticed by others, as they were preparing to host a wedding reception during our visit). I couldn't help but keep snapping pictures... I'm sure you can see why!

4th of July Photo-Blog

2009-07-09T18:10:00.000-07:00

This past 4th of July weekend, we were fortunate enough to spend the weekend camping out in Sonoma, and decided to drive into town for the Kenwood parade and pancake breakfast. It was small town Americana at its finest! Not only were the celebrations absolutely delightful, but I got to test drive my brand new D-SLR camera for the first time.

We started the morning with a pancake breakfast hosted at this beautifully traditional old church:

Apparently, they've been doing this for 20 years and have actually built their own gi-normous pancake cooker. It's amazing!

I love these guys!

Then, we headed to the end of the block for the smallest parade we've ever seen. There wasn't a single marching band!

But, we got to see every classic car in the county (like, all five of them):

Even George got into the action! He was so popular, kids IN the parade were pointing and shouting, "Look at the chihuahua!":

And oh yes, a little proof that I was actually there!

Happy Birthday, America!

The Novas Project

2009-06-24T18:17:00.000-07:00

Molly will be leaving in just three months now for her upcoming mission trip. That's coming up quick, considering she's been preparing for almost a year! She will be leaving September 23 to participate in a group training in Matamoros, MX (this is the same location that Gary and I had our training for the World Race). Once the training segment concludes, teams will be dispersing to various ministry locations across the world. These include:

* Swaziland (This is where Molly feels God is calling her)
* South Africa
* Uganda
* Philippines
* Nicaragua
* England
* Ireland
* Romania
* Mexico
* Peru
* Philadelphia, PA

I can't look at this list of locations without getting a tingle and wishing I were going somewhere too! If you get that same excitement about being discipled while serving God on the mission field, it's not too late... there's about two more weeks left to apply. (and you better believe if I wasn't called to support my husband to finish seminary in Sacramento, I'd be on my way to Swaziland... or Uganda... or Nicaragua, Peru, Mexico, or London!)

Even if it's not for you at this time, you can check out what Molly will be doing at the Novas link here.

Enough

2009-05-27T20:55:00.001-07:00

As it turns out, my return to the working world has not been conducive to my blogging routine (no surprise for any of you, I'm sure). Honestly, these past few months it's been good for me to step back, slow down, and focus on taking it one day at a time.

My new job has been going fantastically well. I've been there almost exactly three months, and I am experiencing more and more days in which I'm not popping into my co-worker's cubicles with multiple questions. I had thought that I would love being a case manager, and so far, I'm right. I just love that I get to help people every day, in such a positive work environment. The past several months, leading up to me starting this job, I had felt more and more restless, as if I were missing something. I feel that God was preparing me then for the big changes in store for us.

Don't get me wrong, I am not without my hard days. I'll have a couple of good weeks, then randomly get hit by a wave of grief and anger that lays me low for a day or so. I'm not a 'stuffer', so I cry it out and trust that healing will come. I have a lot of disappointments in 'church', and it will take me a while before I am ready to fully engage again. Despite all that, God's grace has been abundant, and I feel His presence now more fully than over the past two years. Through His grace, I can withstand whatever He allows to come my way.

It's a bit of a miracle to me to be aware that many changes are headed our direction, but being able to trust totally that He will lead in His own timing. This September, we will be moving, Molly will be headed off to the mission field, and Gary resumes full-time student status at seminary. It's useless to ponder too heavily on what we might be doing two years from now, because what our lives will look like in four months is still a mystery. I'm not saying we're not thinking and talking about what might be, but there's a heavy blanket of peace over the whole process. God knows what lies ahead, and He'll direct us when it's time.

Meanwhile, I'll appreciate the gift of living each day, one day at a time. I'll thank God for my family, my friends, and for the deliciousness of sun on my face cooled by the gentle breeze. I know He is with me, and that is enough.

The End of an Era

2009-05-25T09:37:00.000-07:00

My first car was a 1990 Chrysler LeBaron, the four-door, not the coupe, and not that tacky convertible either. This was the grandpa model, with the leather seats, and the digital dashboard, and the power everything.

I bought that car (with considerable help from my mom) my sophomore year in college, and it changed everything. No longer was I stuck on campus. Now, the entire city of Los Angeles (and surrounding communities) opened up to me, a new frontier to be explored.

Now, twelve years later, she’s not the beauty she once was. Upon taking your seat behind the wheel, you find that you are welcomed by the creak of well-worn shocks and struts. If you try to roll down the driver’s side window, it falls into the door. Turn on the radio and you get nothing but static and the the hiss of shorted out speaker wire. That’s assuming the battery isn’t dead entirely.

And while the dust of years spent sitting under the carport blankets the car inside and out (in fact, the word “Bonus” is still clearly visible, written with a finger in the dust of the instrument panel), I still remember another time when chrome gleamed and the world seemed full of adventure.

I gave that car away today. The tow truck from the charity I donated it to has come and gone. The economics of the thing being what they are, it simply made more sense to donate it than to attempt patching it up one more time. Maybe the folks at the charity will get it running again, sell it, and someone else will get to enjoy it as I did.

So today, in loving tribute, I present my Top Five LeBaron Memories.

5. What Parking Meter? -- It was a frosty winter morning in Los Angeles, and my defroster was on the fritz. That year, Jason and I had an on-campus apartment, but my parking garage was off campus with a shuttle running between.

We were returning home from an all-night computer game session at a friend’s neighborhood apartment. (For my younger readers, back in those days, if you wanted to shoot your friends in a virtual deathmatch, you had to have all the computers in the same place and hook them together with a cable. I know, it’s primitive, but it worked for us.) Since we couldn’t very well carry both computers and both monitors with us on the shuttle, we decided to park temporarily in the lot adjacent to our apartment building (the one with parking meters on every stall), unload the computers, and then go park the car.

Everything went perfectly, up until the “going to park the car” part. Because I had no defroster, and because it was winter, the windshield was probably 65-70% fogged up. I could sort of see, but not very well. Being a somewhat impetuous young man, I didn’t see this as a reason to not drive the car over to my garage right away. Unfortunately, while maneuvering out of the lot, I ran right over a parking meter, bending the post it was mounted on to the ground, and leaving a massive impression in my front left quarter panel. Didn’t see it at all.

My friends mocked me mercilessly, especially since I drove professionally at the time.

4. New Years Eve -- I don’t remember the year, nor the exact circumstances, but suffice it to say, I found myself on New Years Eve at about 10:30, trying to get from my house in Lake Elsinore to Katherine’s house in Simi Valley to share a midnight kiss with my lovely and enchanting girlfriend. Ordinarily, this is a two-hour trip. I decided to see if I could make it in an hour and a half.

The freeways were absolutely empty that night, partygoers already settled in at there destination of choice for the turning of the calendar page. And it was a good thing, too, because I was flying. I don’t remember my exact speed, but I do recall looking down at the digital dash, seeing a monochrome number that read “108,” and thinking maybe I should throttle back my 3.8-liter V-6, just a tad.

Amazingly I arrived, safe, sound, and ticket-free with about four minutes to spare. Happy New Year. Smooch!

3. Point Doom -- After an impromptu late-afternoon decision to round up our girlfriends (though they lived counties apart), I found myself in the car with my best friend and roomie Jason, his girlfriend Christi, the lovely Katherine, and our buddy Scott, attempting to navigate backroads through the mountains of Malibu on our way to the beach for a nighttime stroll. I say attempting, because it came pretty obvious pretty quickly that we were lost.

It didn’t take long, driving as we were on a deserted, windy, mountain road in the middle of the night, for our imaginations to run away with us. It occurred to us that this was a great opening sequence for a horror movie. Five college kids get lost on their way to the beach for a midnight stroll, when their car breaks down and they are forced to walk to find help. Little do they know, a knife-wielding maniac lurks in the underbrush, waiting to pick them off, one by one.

We began discussing plot points and assigning character roles. We figured Scott would get killed first, since he was the only one without a girlfriend. Jason and Christi would be the couple who sneaks off to fool around, only to be punished for their indiscretions by the aforementioned knife-wielding maniac, probably wielding a pitchfork or other farm implement by this point in the film. The plot would culminate in my heroic attempt to save Katherine, which would fall dreadfully short, leaving Katherine to deal with the monster on her own. She would concoct a brilliant rouse, dispatch the maniac, and return to her life on campus, where she would go on to date a much better looking, more athletic boyfriend. But she would forever be haunted by the events of that night...

Just as we were really getting into it, laughing and yelling the entire way, we rounded a corner and saw a sign that read, “Point Dume.” Instantly, we had the name for our film, “POINT DOOM!!”

And yes, we eventually found the beach.

2. Dates with Katherine -- In college, our favorite hangout was Burbank. Katherine and I would often head out after an evening of studying or ballroom dancing or whatever to catch a 10:30 or 11:00 movie, then off to the Corral Cafe, an all-night greasy spoon that Burbank cops frequented, so you knew it had to be good. We’d sit there for hours, talking and dreaming together.

Then, somewhere around 3am, we’d head back to campus. Katherine would sit in the middle seat of the big leather bench so she could snuggle close to me as I drove us home. Often, I’d drive a little slower than necessary, just to prolong the moment.

1. Our Wedding Day -- The best day of my life, and my LeBaron was there. It was the chariot that carried my brand new bride and me from our ceremony to our reception, and then later to our bridal suite, and then the next morning to our honeymoon cruise. I laugh when I look at the pictures, taken carefully from the right side of the car so as to hide the gash left behind by that parking meter.

I remember sitting in the backseat on our way to the reception, surrounded by layers of tulle and petticoats, looking into my wife’s eyes, and feeling blessed beyond measure that she would be mine for my whole life.

That day will be ten years ago this Friday. So much has changed since then. And yet, so much remains the same. The car is gone, but I still know that I am blessed beyond measure.

I love you, Katherine. I always will.

Angel Island

2009-04-28T21:20:00.000-07:00

For about the past month or so, Gary and I had designated last weekend to be our 'official backpacker's initiation camping trip weekend'. You see, we love hiking, and we love camping, but we'd not yet combined the two. And, since we have most of the gear necessary to make such a trip feasible, thought it to be something we should try.

Well, the short version of the story is that last weekend we had to be flexible and change our plans, and save the overnighter for another day. To be more honest, we had to change plans a few, ok, many many times. By the time we landed on "Plan W", or whatever it was, we found ourselves headed to the BART station to take the train to San Francisco, to take the ferry to Angel Island, to hike a trail with numerous expansive views of the bay. Trust me, I have no complaints, because we had a truly wonderful day in a gorgeous location. Which of course, merits one of my famous photo-blogs, so you can enjoy it with me. =)

Before we even got to the location, I had to snap this pic: I love the lines of the track, and the roof, and the sun, and shadows...

Once we arrived in San Francisco, we headed to Pier 41 and climbed on the Blue & Gold ferry. This is the view of the city as we pulled away:

We zipped right past Alcatraz. It seemed so close to the mainland!

Once we landed at Angel Island, we found the trail that would take us to the summit:

After hiking just a few minutes, you get a nice view of the harbor and the dock:

A few more minutes, and the view widens:

I would have walked right past this unique flower, if Gary hadn't stopped me:

After two hours of climbing, we were rewarded with a 360 degree view of the bay, the city of San Francisco, and numerous bridges.

The sun shone on our faces, and a gentle breeze kept us cool.

It's the little things, though, that take my breath away:

On this hike, Gary spotted all the cool stuff, including a pair of vultures, perched just 15 feet below our trail. Here's one of them, checking ME out:

Yep, I'm such a poser. Posing with the posies.

Humans weren't the only ones enjoying the fine afternoon. How cute is this family?

On the ferry ride home, we enjoyed watching the boaters sail by the Golden Gate Bridge.

There you have it... the Westons explore Angel Island!

A Living Eucharist

2009-04-17T09:36:00.000-07:00

In Chapter Six of JWTSC (see immediately previous post), Rob Bell and Don Golden talk about the concept of Eucharist.

The word itself comes from the Greek word eucharizomai, meaning thankful or thanksgiving. Literally the word means “to give what is good.” Thus, we can say that what we celebrate in the Eucharist (or the Lord’s Supper, or Communion, or whatever your tradition calls it) is God’s “good gift” to mankind, the gift of Jesus Christ. Through His sacrifice on the cross, God reconciles all of creation to Himself. Jesus’ body was broken and His blood was poured that you and I might reap the benefits of forgiveness and eternal life.

And this is the authors’ intent in talking about Eucharist. As they put it, “For someone to receive, someone has to give...If someone somewhere benefits, then someone somewhere has paid something.” (pg. 149)

Eucharist is about sacrifice. About a good gift that is given, but not without a price.

The Eucharist we celebrate is all about the body of Christ being broken, and the blood of Christ being poured out, for the sake of others. Thus, if we who would call ourselves Christians are truly the body of Christ, then a Christian ought to be “a living Eucharist, allowing her body to be broken and her blood poured out for the healing of the world.” (pg. 150)

That is our calling. That is life in the way of Jesus. Seeking to be broken and poured out for the sake of others. It’s why we still marvel at the lives of Mother Teresa, and Hudson Taylor, and Jim Elliot, and Brother Andrew. They were broken and poured out for God’s glory, and it cost them something. We marvel at these lives because there’s something in us that knows they are what life in Christ is supposed to be.

The problem is, we look at these heroes of the faith and subconsciously we say, “I’m no Mother Teresa. I'm glad she did what she did, but I could never do that, so I’m going to abandon this brokenness thing altogether.”

And that is where we miss the mark. The way of brokenness, the path of descent, is a journey. It is a counter-cultural lifestyle that must be learned and nurtured and mastered over time. It is a day-by-day yielding to the Holy Spirit by which we surrender more and more control over our lives to God, until we have eventually given Him everything. It is then that we will be living the Christian life as it was meant to be lived.

So where to begin this journey of brokenness? The authors raise a couple of questions that are of help here:

The Eucharist is what happens when the question is asked, What does it look like for us to be a Eucharist for these people, here and now?

What does it look like for us to break ourselves open and pour ourselves out for the healing of these people in this time in this place? (pg. 158)

Think about your neighborhood. Your city. Your workplace. Your family. What would it look like to break yourself open and pour yourself out for the healing of others in these places?

Maybe it’s buying some groceries for a neighbor who’s unemployed. Maybe it’s buying those groceries every week until he gets a job.

Maybe it’s having lunch with a coworker you never talk to. Maybe it’s having lunch with them every week until you can call yourself friends.

Maybe it’s giving away everything in your house that you don’t need. Which is probably most everything you own.

Maybe it’s donating your best clothes to Goodwill, instead of giving them your worn out and ill-fitting clothes like we usually do.

Maybe it’s realizing that you have an extra bedroom and offering it to someone who is struggling financially, or maybe just to someone you want to share life with.

Whatever it is, whatever you do, it should cost you something and benefit someone else. If you can do it and not feel the sacrifice of it, it’s not Eucharist. At least, not Eucharist in the way of Christ.

Believe me, living as a Eucharist is as big a challenge to me as it is to anybody. But isn’t it a challenge worth taking? These ideas inspire me, and spur me on to want deeper sacrifices and more selflessness in my own life. Surely, living broken and poured out for the sake of others is not an easy way to live. But it is surely the best way.

Lord Jesus, grant me the strength today to break myself open and pour myself out for someone else. Take my selfishness from me and give me the courage to lay down my life, that others might be healed. I desire to be a Eucharist, just as You are a Eucharist. In Your Name, and for the sake of Your Glory, I pray. Amen.

Jesus Wants to Save Christians

2009-04-14T09:45:00.000-07:00

I recently finished reading Rob Bell’s latest book, the provocatively titled, Jesus Wants to Save Christians: A Manifesto for the Church in Exile. Co-authored with Don Golden of World Relief, the book traces the history of the nation Israel through four time periods that correspond to the places where they occurred.

Egypt: The place of crying out to God, and experiencing God’s response to that cry, which is salvation.

Sinai: The place of covenant between the nation and God, of new identity and a new way of living.

Jerusalem: The place of distraction, where power corrupts the original vision of what the nation was meant to be, where they lose the thread of their own story.

Babylon: The place of exile, where the nation once again cries out to God and contemplates what comes next.

The authors use this pattern as a launching pad to talk about “the church in exile,” suggesting that we as Jesus followers have lost our own story, that we need to cry out to God for His restoration, and that we are faced with a great opportunity to re-imagine the church, to re-imagine ourselves as the people of God.

In all honesty, I found most of the book to be a bit of a slog. Not that it wasn’t engaging, but more that it seemed not to be going anywhere. But the last chapter and the epilogue blew me away. The rest of the book was simply setting the table for the feast of truthy goodness that was to come.

So I have decided to explore some of the ideas and themes put forth in the final chapter and epilogue, bit by bit, day by day, here on the blog. I do this in part to help solidify my own thinking and response, and in part to put forth these ideas in the hope that they will resonate with others as deeply as they have resonated with me.

The themes are deep and rich: being a living Eucharist to the people around us, seeking to live broken and poured out for the sake of others, discovering a new humanity in our church community, avoiding the dangerous seduction of demographics and marketing, embracing the path of descent as Jesus did, to name a few.

I can’t say how long this examination will last, or that there will be significant insight gained from the experience. None the less, I’m excited for the endeavor.

Get Paid for Camping!

2009-03-28T20:35:00.001-07:00

In these tough times, we're all feeling the pinch of the economy. That's why I had to share with you, dear readers, a legitimate money-making scheme that only requires a drive to one of the most scenic places on earth!

According to the Yosemite Park Website:

Temp-RATE-ture Promotion at Curry Village

Starting October 1, the lower temperatures drop, the lower rates get at Curry Village. Guests who book the Temp-RATE-ture Special will receive a rate in an unheated tent cabin based on the previous night's recorded low temperature.

Not bad, eh? But wait, it gets even better:

What if it is below zero? If the temperature drops below 0°F, we will pay you to stay in our tent cabins.

Whoa, seriously? You will PAY ME to stay in your unheated cabin? And all I have to do is freeze my arse off??? Awesome!

Who's in with me?

We Are But Dust

2009-03-26T23:32:00.000-07:00

I came down with a cold last night. Make no mistake, it sucks.

All day today, I’ve felt as though my head were two feet in diameter. I can’t stand up for more than a few seconds without being promptly persuaded that I should sit down before I fall down. I’m sniffling and sneezing, and generally hating life at the moment.

But even illness is not beyond God’s use. As I lay there on the couch, waiting for the room to stop spinning, it occurred to me that this weakness I feel, this diminishment, is a reminder of my frailty and weakness before God, and thus a cause for humility before Him.

Who am I to live as though I could do without Him? I can’t even stand erect.

Who am I to jealously make plans about my future? I can’t even guarantee I’ll wake up in the morning.

In Genesis 18:27, Abraham says that he has “been so bold as to speak to the Lord, though I am nothing but dust and ashes...” And Abraham was absolutely right. We are completely dependent upon God for every day we live, every heartbeat we feel, every breath we draw. It is in Christ that we live and move and have our being, and apart from Him, there is no righteousness, no meaning, no life.

So in my illness, I pray:

Lord, thank you for teaching me that I am but dust. I freely admit my need for you, day-by-day, hour-by-hour. May this malady be a reminder to me of your goodness and grace, that though I am weak, you make me strong in Christ. Heal my body, Lord Jesus, and heal my soul.

For the cause of Your Glory I pray, Amen.

From the hymn,
I NEED THEE EVERY HOUR
by Annie S. Hawks

I need thee every hour, in joy or pain;
come quickly and abide, or life is vain.

I need thee, O I need thee;
every hour I need thee;
O bless me now, my Savior, I come to thee.

Here's the Kicker

2009-03-24T10:17:00.000-07:00

My friend, former student, bass mentor, and fellow Dr. Pepper lover, Cory Kick has started a blog of his own. His first post examines why we have lost sight of the Great Commission.

Cory is a deeply thoughtful and insightful young man, and I encourage you to listen to what he has to say.

Check it out here.

A Return to Blogging: Small Churches

2009-03-23T13:21:00.000-07:00

As most of the readers of this blog probably already know, I (Gary) have been battling depression these many months. My depression has made it very difficult to concentrate on anything for an extended period of time, so reading, writing, and similar tasks have become much more difficult for me. In an effort to take back some of this ground, I am forcing myself to write for this blog more regularly. It's therapeutic for me to share what I'm thinking, and I really do enjoy writing, so it makes sense for this to be an outlet for me.

With that preface out of the way, here's my initial effort:

I like small churches. Always have, always will. This is true for a number of reasons, but the core of it is simply this: I think discipleship happens in smaller groups rather than in bigger ones.

When I look at the life of Christ, I notice a bit of a pattern. When Jesus chose to reveal a little bit of Himself, it was almost always before a small group of people if not a single individual. The servants at the Cana Wedding, Nicodemus, the woman at Jacob’s Well, the blind, the demon-possessed, and most notably the Twelve, all received private and semi-private glimpses of who this Jesus of Nazareth really was.

Now crowds, on the other hand, did not seem to be something Jesus enjoyed. It was a crowd in Luke 4 that wanted to throw Him off a cliff -- not the most effective way to start a public ministry. And though the crowd at the Triumphal Entry shouted “Hosanna,” that same crowd just days later would be shouting “Crucify Him!”

Throughout the Gospels, crowds are filled with people demanding more of Jesus - more food, more healings, more miraculous signs. In fact, it seems like every time a pretty good sized crowd started following Jesus, He made every effort to thin them out.

In Luke 14, we find the following verses:

Large crowds were traveling with Jesus, and turning to them he said: "If anyone comes to me and does not hate his father and mother, his wife and children, his brothers and sisters—yes, even his own life—he cannot be my disciple. And anyone who does not carry his cross and follow me cannot be my disciple... In the same way, any of you who does not give up everything he has cannot be my disciple.”

And again, in John 6, when Jesus teaches that He is the Bread of Life, and that His disciples must eat of His flesh and drink of His blood, we find that his was too much for the crowd: “On hearing it, many of his disciples said,

“This is a hard teaching. Who can accept it?’... From this time many of his disciples turned back and no longer followed him.”

It seems to me that if any modern evangelical pastor had been standing near Jesus when He said things like these, he would have been tempted to correct the Lord. “Jesus, you are making it unnecessarily difficult for people to come to you. You should lighten up and be a little more ‘seeker sensitive.’ How do you ever expect to get a church up off the ground?”

And maybe that’s just it. Jesus wasn’t concerned with building a following, building a crowd, building an organization or institution. Jesus was building disciples. Individuals. Persons who knew Him, and loved Him, and desired to follow in His Way. And that’s what church should be about today as well.

Discipleship happens when we get into each others’ lives in an intimate way, when we are honest with one another, when we give each other permission to speak into each others’ lives the very utterances of God (1 Peter 4:11). It doesn’t happen where I can show up, talk to no one, go unnoticed, and anonymously blend into the crowd; where I am nothing more than a consumer -- a customer to be sold to, pleased, and encouraged to come back.

And so, my heart soars when I walk into a congregation of 100, or 75, or 50, where the pastor can mention people by name in his sermon and the whole body knows who he is talking about. I love worshiping in a place where people are missed when they’re gone, where there’s a sense of unity and wholeness that comes by not just sitting in the same building together an hour a week, but by doing life together.

Put more simply, crowds are not intimate; churches ought to be.

Spring is here!

2009-03-22T09:55:00.000-07:00

Last weekend, Gary and I took advantage of our Sunday-evening church plans to take an early-morning hike.

At long last, the weather has improved enough to begin our hiking for the year!

Because it's early enough in the season, the streams were running and the waterfalls were falling.

Wildflowers were springing up all around us.

Few things are as refreshing to my soul as breathing the fresh air and enjoying the natural beauty of God's creation on full display.

We even spotted some wildlife - a little hummingbird singing from his perch in the sky.

A great day on Mt. Diablo...

Japanese Tea Garden

2009-03-21T20:01:00.000-07:00

Last night I had the privilege of joining some great ladies on a fun outing to Calvary Temple's "Japanese Tea Garden" women's event.

Whoever was in charge of decorating went all out making the facility look amazingly beautiful... the entry featured a Japanese style bridge, pagoda entrance, ponds with fountains... the works! The stunning scenery made it easy to leave your cares behind...

Inside, the main area was filled with dinner tables, individually decorated with fine china in an assortment of colors and themes. Though the decor was Japanese, the food was English Tea - finger sandwiches and scones, and of course, tea! While we munched on the most incredible sandwiches ever, I caught up with old friends and chatted with new ones.

The main stage was highlighted by a painted backdrop, large vases of cherry blossoms, and a ceiling runway of paper lanterns.

It wasn't hard to imagine a black velvet night sky with 30 luminous full moons glowing overhead...

Once the food was gone and the conversation had subsided, we turned our attention forward to the guest speaker, Connie Neal. Through analogies of bulbs, dirt, and flowers, Connie reminded us that what we see right now is not the end of the story in our lives. Go has created great potential within each of us that He will bring to fruition at the right time (as we allow Him to). What a great reminder on the first day of spring, to look at the beautiful flowers blooming around us and consider the great love and hope we have in our heavenly father.

Portland Memories

2009-03-17T06:48:00.000-07:00

It's about time for more about our trip to Portland last month!

Gary and I had never traveled up north together, and February was the perfect time to go, while we were between jobs.

We had time share points for a place in a little town called Welches, about an hour east of the city. The setting was beautiful - trees, mountains, snow... just what this California girl needed to feel like winter had arrived!

There's not much better than getting away from it all, sitting by the fire with glass of wine in hand, watching the snow fall!

My dream for this year is to go somewhere to have a white Christmas, and these few days in the snow only whetted that desire.

The other highlight of the week was spending time with our friend Melissa, and meeting her husband Keith. Melissa was another founding member of Jacob's Well, our first church back in Sacramento when we were first married. We really connected over the fact that we were three of the five in their twenties at the church at the time! She moved up north a while back, and we haven't had a chance to visit until now. She's now got a great job, a sweet husband, and a baby on the way. Congratulations, Melissa!

Melissa and Keith had fun showing us around the city; and planned some memorable outings for us including a hockey game and an elaborate dinner at a Moroccan restaurant called Marrakesh.

Other highlights were the Japanese Garden, which I've already posted about here, an amazing setting to relax and enjoy nature, and a fun place called Noun, an antique shop / artist boutique, with a station in the back selling confections by St. Cupcake. Good times.

Portland Japanese Garden

2009-03-06T19:00:00.000-08:00

Hard to believe, just a week ago I was in Portland, enjoying this beautiful garden during a break in the rain. Here are a few of my favorite pics:

The Gathering and Faith Christian Fellowship

2009-03-02T22:28:00.000-08:00

We're back from our trip to Portland (more on that later), and I have reports to give on our last two church visits (I'm processing my experiences as a long-time believer, first-time visitor to local churches through the forum of this blog). It's still weird to go to any church but Fair Oaks, but I have enjoyed seeing God work through my brothers and sisters in Christ throughout the area.

Because we planned to leave for Portland first thing Sunday morning, we found a church with a Saturday evening service to attend before we left (thanks Joy for the recommendation!).

The Community Presbyterian Church in Danville recently combined a Saturday service with a church plant, which now meets as "The Gathering" in their multi-purpose room. They've only been meeting about two months, but there were probably a couple hundred people gathered together.

Although the meeting room was basically a large gym, it was obviously well and thoughtfully designed for worship gatherings. Chairs were set up in a horse-shoe around a center stage, enhancing the feel of 'gathering' in community. Curtains behind the stage made a tasteful backdrop as well as providing great acoustics for the worship band (Who expects great sound quality in a gym? I'm telling you, it's possible). Children and youth all had programs running during the meeting time.

The music and speaking were very good, though they felt a bit 'slick' for my tastes. The worship leader made a couple of bizarre jokes that, while not necessarily inappropriate, were distracting from the purpose of worshipping the Lord.

My favorite thing about The Gathering was their clear intention to build community. Part of their meeting was devoted to a 'coffee-break' time to get up, stretch, and connect with other worshippers while grabbing a beverage or snack. And more significantly, they have set their meeting time at 5:00 pm so that people can go straight from the meeting to having dinner together. On the evening we visited, the pastor had set up with a local Italian restaurant to provide coupons for the whole congregation, with the intention of all going out to eat together afterward! Good stuff.

This past Sunday, we headed just down the street to visit Faith Christian Fellowship. We picked an unusual morning to visit, however, due to the Church Without Shoes campaign. (I was surprised to learn, after leaving Fair Oaks, that there are about thirty-five other churches/ministries in the area which have united for mutual focus on spiritual encouragement and devotion; these include the i-lent project, a community-wide celebration of communion, corporate prayer, and this past Sunday, a pastor swap.)

We happened to visit on the week of the Pastor swap, so we were able to enjoy the worship of Faith Christian Fellowship while learning from the teaching of Pastor Russell Belmont of Calvary Baptist Church in Concord.

The church was beautiful, with a nice 'churchy' feel: pews, stained glass, pipe organ. This did not lend a stuffy atmosphere though, because the service was so welcoming and inclusive. I loved seeing multiple youth as part of the worship team (even though the rest of the youth group was on a winter ski trip). There was a special-needs fellowship group listed in the bulletin, a first in my experience. Following the service, a luncheon was held, though we did not attend.

I can't say how much I appreciated the teaching of the visiting pastor. It has been months since I've experienced teaching that has really touched me, where I felt God speaking to me through His word. There was a moment, a short but beautiful moment, in which my heart leapt and I felt a glimmer of hope for my belief in 'church'.

I guess we'll be putting Calvary Baptist on our list of churches to attend in our future!

Free Books!

2009-02-20T18:51:00.000-08:00

Like to read? Books are good, free books are better!

Some friends of ours have started up a new blog called "Bookaway", designed to be an online book exchange of sorts.

If you'd like a free book, or if you have books to give away, visit this site to check it out.

Bookaway!

Wine Country Getaway - Photo Blog

2009-02-17T11:20:00.000-08:00

Last weekend, we headed to Napa for a couple days with friends. Though the getaway wasn't intended as a Valentine's celebration, it worked out as a happy coincidence. This was our friends' first visit to Napa, so the hubbo and I enjoyed the opportunity to show off a few of our favorite finds, as well as discover a few new ones together.

The first night we enjoyed dinner at a great Italian restaurant in downtown Napa. It was one of those places with pictures all over the wall, and a waiter that was really excited to hand-grate the parmesan cheese on your food. The atmosphere was enhanced by live music, an incredibly talented guitar player occasionally joined by a female vocalist.

Following dinner, we headed over to Silo's, the only nightlife in town. This was a cool jazz lounge, with more live music - this time, an incredibly talented pianist. Who knew there was such great music to be found in wine country?

The next morning, we went on the tour at the Beringer estate, the longest operating winery in California. Isn't this beautiful? The original Beringers built this beautiful home for $28,000:

Inside the Beringer caves:

Friday afternoon, we headed to the Culinary Institute of America for a cooking demonstration. The teaching chef demonstrated a recipe for couer de creme with raspberry sauce. I'm sure I could be gourmet too, with a kitchen like this!

Happy Valentine's Day!

Church Homeless

2009-02-15T22:10:00.000-08:00

And, so it begins.

After last week's farewell, we are now officially church-shoppers. (I say that, because that's the only term I know to use. We're not actually planning on purchasing a church. I suppose the other terms could be church-homeless, church-first-time-visitoring, or seeking a church-forever-family)

We don't expect to settle into a place right away, but are actually looking forward to the opportunity to see what many of the other churches in the area are doing (especially from a variety of traditions/denominations). I hope to write a little something from each of our visits. (I'm including a couple website pics here, to give you a feel for things)

In any case, this morning, the hubbo and I went to visit a new place of worship. Today, we went to a church called The Creek, a congregation that Hillside Covenant planted about ten years ago. We had been invited by friends, and it was nice to see familiar faces when we walked through the doors.

I appreciated that the greeters were friendly and helpful, but not obnoxious. When things got started, we climbed the stairs to enter the theater where the service is held (the church meets in a local high school). It was a cool location, though not necessarily conducive to a sense of community - you really can't see anyone you're worshipping with, besides whoever happens to be onstage.

I really liked the atmosphere - comfortable, friendly, respectful. The services (as well as their plans for the year) are obviously well thought-through, with many elements that create a meaningful whole. I knew about half of the worship songs (the ones I knew were mostly Crowder, yay!) and really enjoyed the drumming of the djembe player (I think he's from Ghana? ), but due to either poor acoustics or low participation I didn't hear anyone from the 'audience' singing.

The pastor was friendly and a good speaker, I thought. He talked a lot about "incarnation", that is, living out the mission of the church in our every day lives. Unfortunately, I missed part of the sermon due to a severe cough attack, when I ran out to get a cough drop and some tea. When I came back, the pastor had brought up a couple people to interview about how they live out their faith in their workplaces. He followed that up with a video clip, and a few applicable verses to keep in mind.

The whole service was very accessible, and really pointed towards identity (both personally and corporately) in Christ. Based on various announcements or reports sprinkled throughout the service, I trust that this is a church that is actively living out their beliefs, and are making a notable impact on their community.

I would definitely be interested in visiting again.

Next Sunday, we'll be driving all day on our way up to Portland, OR. Perhaps we can find a church with a Saturday evening service to visit before we leave. Any recommendations?

What just happened?

2009-02-08T16:35:00.000-08:00

I'm sooooooo curious if anyone knows how to explain this:

(an extraordinary spike in page views to this blog yesterday)

If any of you know how I can figure this out, please leave a comment below!

Peace in the Midst

2009-02-06T15:38:00.000-08:00

Hello, Friends.

Katherine has been doing a masterful job of keeping everyone up to date on our situation, and I appreciate her efforts greatly. But I thought it was time for me to share a few words of my own with you all.

As I write this, I am sitting at my dining room table, on the verge of my last weekend at Fair Oaks Church. And while there is certainly a measure of sadness and grief in my heart, the overwhelming emotion within me is peace.

Peace because I know that I am loved, first and foremost by our Heavenly Father, but also by the good people of Fair Oaks, the students in the ministry there, and countless friends and family members who have called and e-mailed these past few weeks.

Peace because I sense that the students of Fair Oaks have understood my heart; my passion for God's Word, my commitment to discipleship and spiritual formation, and my desire for them to make their faith their own.

Peace because many of the students have heeded that call. Just this month, the Student Leadership Team (a group of 12 or so high schoolers) decided to meet on their own, without adult prompting, to discuss the future of the ministry after I leave. The result of that meeting was a decision to fast and pray together. And so they did. They met together, fasted for 36 hours, shared life, and prayed for one another and for the ministry. In the face of difficulty, they chose to draw close to the Lord, to seek His face before doing anything else. There is a reason why God chose them to be leaders of this ministry, and I could not be more proud of them.

Peace because God's hand of provision is already on display. Katherine landed a great job in only three weeks of looking in the midst of the worst job market we've ever seen. God is clearly taking care of us.

Peace because I look forward to what's next, whatever that may be. Katherine and I feel pretty sure that a return to full-time school in the fall is the right move. Taking a couple of years out to finish my Seminary degree will give me the break I need from ministry to get well, and it will prepare me for a return to full-time ministry down the road. No matter where the Lord leads us, I am optimistic about this time of healing, reflection, and preparation.

Peace because I have an amazing and godly wife. Katherine is my best friend. She is a woman who hungers and thirsts for righteousness. She yearns for more of Jesus in her life and in the lives of those around her. And she has been so very good to me through my struggles with depression. Her hope, her faith, her belief in me, will me forward when I feel like I can't go on. She reminds me when I forget that God has given me a gift to preach. She supports me, and comforts me, and loves me. I am blessed among men to have Katherine for my wife.

Peace because I trust Jesus. In the past, I have quit jobs for Him. I sold my house for Him. I followed Him all the way around the world. I have held orphans for Him, preached in dirt streets running with sewage for Him, and been insulted for Him. I have had my heart broken for Him more than once. And I would do it all again. He has never steered me wrong, never put me to shame, never abandoned me. And He won't this time either.

Thanks again for all of your warmth, prayers, love, and suport. I promise to try to write more in the days and weeks to come.

Now what?

2009-02-06T15:20:00.000-08:00

Thanks to everyone who's responded to my posts on this blog and on facebook.

Many of you have expressed curiousity about what we'll be doing next.

Our plan (as of right now) is for Gary to focus on finishing his seminary education. He's almost halfway through the M. Div. program with Western Seminary. Though he started the coursework several years ago, he's been able to take only one class at a time while working full-time and doing ministry on top of that (not to mention taking a year off to travel the world).

Once he goes back to school full-time, he should be able to finish in about a year and a half. Gary enjoys school quite a bit, and it will be a huge blessing for him to have that done before he gets into ministry again (which we both hope will be in our future, at the right time).

As for me, I'm going back to work to support the family while Gary focuses on school. It's good timing, as I had already been considering the notion of getting a job, for several reasons. And I can definitely see God's hand in this, for He provided me with an amazing job within a couple of weeks of starting to look!

I'll be working as a case manager for the regional center, overseeing the provision of services for individuals with developmental disabilities. The job has great benefits, a beautiful location (Todos Santos Plaza), and I feel that I really hit it off with the supervisor! I start March 2, which means I have the rest of this month to prepare for the transition - get my appointments out of the way, set a new budget, etc.

We are allowed to stay in our home (the parsonage) until September, which means that we've got all summer to figure out our housing before Molly heads off to Africa and Gary starts school in the fall. I'm very thankful for this aspect of stability in our lives right now.

We still have several choices ahead of us, and I don't know yet how all that will come together, but I know that we can take it one step at a time and that's ok.

Breaking the Silence

2009-02-04T13:55:00.000-08:00

Ok, time to break the blog silence.

The past month has been extremely chaotic for our family. January 7th, Gary found out that Fair Oaks Church was asking him to resign his position as youth pastor.

This request came from the fact that over the past year, Gary has been fighting depression, and over the past few months that struggle has impacted his effectiveness in ministry. Our church leadership feels that for Gary to step down and focus on beating the depression would be best for him personally and for the ministry as a whole.

At first, I found myself in shock, for I didn't see this coming at all. Over the past few weeks, though, I have found myself grateful for the chance for Gary to be healthy. I believe his depression is beatable, and I am eager to see him enjoy life once more, whatever it takes.

We have received a phenomenal outpouring of love and support from friends and members of the congregation. The number of hugs, encouraging notes, and phone calls has been astounding. We are surrounded by and uplifted in prayer, and I have no doubt that God is continuing to work in our lives in a very real way.

I admire Gary for choosing to be so forthright about his struggles. Depression is not an oft-discussed topic in most churches, which I feel is a shame considering how many people are impacted by it in some way. Since Gary's letter went out to the congregation, countless people have come forward desiring to share their experience of depression in their own or in a loved one's life. I pray that his openness will encourage others in some way.

We appreciate your support and your prayers. We are thankful that through every trial we experience in life, we can know that God is walking us through. We are holding on to the 'peace that transcends understanding', and we know that things are going to be ok.

Logan, the Sky Angel Cowboy

2009-01-18T18:30:00.000-08:00

I was extremely touched by the way Logan, 13, described how Christians can face loss in their lives. This is definitely worth a couple minutes out of your day:

ht: mom

Discipleship according to Mark Batterson

2009-01-17T23:13:00.000-08:00

I'm a regular reader of author-pastor Mark Batterson's blog E-votional.com. He just put up an excellent post on discipleship here. Here's a snippet:

We cannot reduce the gospel to the forgiveness of sins. It's about glorifying God by maximizing our God-given potential and serving our God-ordained purpose. It can't just be about creeds. It's got to be about deeds. It can't just be about us. It's got to be about others.

Services for Ben Tollefson

2009-01-06T10:39:00.000-08:00

On New Year's Eve, Concord lost a son to the war in Iraq. Although I didn't know Ben personally, many in our church family loved him dearly. I am reposting this with permission for any who have been looking for this information:

Dear Family and Friends-

We are pleased to report that, with the assistance of many, memorial and funeral services are now set.

Here is how this week is shaping up:

The funeral service will be held on Saturday, January 10, at 11:00 a.m. at Walnut Creek Presbyterian Church, 1801 Lacassie Avenue, Walnut Creek. 94596.

Immediately following the funeral service, Ben will be buried with full military honors at Golden Gate National Cemetary, 1300 Sneath Lane, San Bruno, 94066

Other public events taking place:

Ben will arrive home on Thursday, January 8, at approximately noon, at Buchanan Field in Concord. Anyone may attend, and we thank you ahead of time for your consideration in maintaining a respectful distance. Only immediate family will be allowed by the plane. Ben will then be escorted to Ouimet Brothers Funeral Chapel on Clayton Road in Concord.

There will be a public viewing on Friday, January 9, from 5:00 – 8:00 p.m. at Ouimet. The Clayton-Concord VFW will have a short ceremony at approximately 7:00 p.m.

In conjunction with the Army, the Patriot Guard will provide escorts.

Also, a memorial fund has been set up for Mac (Ben's son).

Here is the information:

Mac James Tollefson Memorial Fund

C/O Wells Fargo Bank

Kirker Pass Office

5431 Clayton Road

Clayton, CA 94517-1039

(925) 672-0501

Looking Back on 2008

2009-01-03T19:32:00.000-08:00

I've been looking for a way to process the year that was 2008, so Marko's blog inspired me to post my own take on this survey. This overview helped remind me that though in many ways 2008 was a hard, dark year for me, it was punctuated by many bright spots.

1) What did you do in 2008 that you’d never done before?
-Hiked 28 miles in one month
-Vacationed in Hawaii
-Planned, led, and translated for a youth mission trip without the aid of an organization
-Tried pilates (love it!)
-Photographed a friend's wedding
-Got sucked into a pop-culture phenomenon (thank you, Stephenie Meyer!). Usually I wait until the hype dies down before I venture anywhere near.

2) Did you keep your New Year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
Um, I don't remember making any last year. And I don't plan on making any this year.

3) Did anyone close to you give birth?
Yes! It was fantastic to hold little Nathaniel on the day he was born. (I think I had seven friends give birth this year... crazy!)

4) Did anyone close to you die?
Unfortunately, this was the year we had to say goodbye to Nan.

5) What countries did you visit?
Guatemala.

6) What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008?
Inspiration and passion fully expressed.

7) What date(s) from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
June 11, Molly graduated high school, and had a (temporarily) paralyzing fall at her graduation night. July 1, we returned to visit our Guatemalan family and church for the first time in 2 1/2 years. Amazing.

8) What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Trusting God and seeing Him work through me to love and mentor Molly like my own daughter. I can't think about it without tears of joy coming to my eyes.

9) Did you suffer illness or injury?
Praise God, I was the healthy one last year. Other than sucky allergies, which I'm just learning to cope with.

10) What was the best thing you bought?
Food for 12-year-old Domingo and his family in Guatemala. Because Domingo required constant attention and care while recovering from a back-breaking fall, his grandfather couldn't go to work and the household was suffering from lack of basic necessities. Best money spent all year.

11) Whose behavior merited celebration?
Spencer, one of our junior highers who of his own accord planned and executed a bake sale to raise money for hungry kids. That kid's my hero.

12) Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Oh gosh, there's more than a couple who come to mind. No need to name names, though. I have been most saddened by Christians who don't take responsibility for commitments they've made (especially to family).

13) Where did most of your money go?
Rent, giving, and car payments.

14) What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Molly and Guatemala. The highlights of my year.

15) What song will always remind you of 2008?
Pocket full of Sunshine - Natasha Beddingfield
A guide to Marine Life - Falling Up
God of this City - Chris Tomlin
Mighty to Save - The Amoeba Singers (Guatemala Team)

16) Compared to this time last year, are you:
Wiser? Only in terms of the sad realities of life.
Healthier? Physically, I might be.
Richer? Relationally, yes!

17) What do you wish you’d done more of?
Invited people over.

18) What do you wish you’d done less of?
Itched (sucky allergies).

19) How did you spend Christmas?
Celebrated over the whole month of December: put up a tree for the first time in four or five years, attended a Christmas musical and a Christmas Eve service at church, then spent the big day opening presents followed by going out to the movies.

20) Did you fall in love in 2008?
Not romantically speaking, but I did grow to love someone very dearly.

21) What was your favorite blog post that you wrote?
"Faithful in the Waiting"

22) What were your favorite TV programs?
30 Rock, Top Model, the Office, American Idol.

23) Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
I don't hate anyone.

24) What was the best book you read?
The Irresistible Revolution, by Shane Claiborne.

25) What was your greatest musical discovery?
Captiva by Falling Up, Viva la Vida by Coldplay, and a song called Reign in Us by Starfield. Plus, that special version of "Mighty to Save".

26) What did you want and get?
Resolution in some old hurts. To see Antonio, Cata, and Pedrito again. A church small group with couples our age. Proficiency in playing the guitar.

27) What did you want and not get?
Answers. A coffee bean grinder. Cute brown shoes.

28) What was your favorite film of this year?
Cloverfield. And, Dark Knight didn't suck.

29) What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned 31, and our friends just happened to already have a pizza and game night planned ("Things"). The next night, Molly and Gary cooked me a gourmet birthday dinner.

30) Which celebrity/public figure did you like the most?
I am just fascinated with Angelina Jolie. She is fierce!

31) How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?
Learning to love layering. And, wearing out my favorite pair of jeans.

32) What kept you sane?
My triad. I have been blessed with two wonderful godly women that I met with weekly to talk and pray with. They've encouraged me through some rough times.

33) Who did you miss?
A high school friend that stopped returning my calls. I miss her.

34) Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008.
Sometimes you have to let a part of yourself die in order to keep another alive.

35) What did you gain this year?
Good memories with new friends, especially involving travel, tri-tip, and Settlers of Catan!

36) What did you lose this year?
My understanding of my life.

37) Who was the best new person you met?
Eric & Yvette (I just can't separate them). I love who they are as people, I am grateful for their friendship, and I can't wait to get to know them even better.

38) Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
I cried out with no reply
and I can't feel you by my side
so I'll hold tight to what I know
You're here, and I'm never alone

Here’s to ‘09…

Molly's New Blog!

2008-12-31T18:44:00.000-08:00

A couple of months ago, we were thrilled to find out that Molly, the young woman that my husband and I are mentoring through shared life, was accepted to Adventures in Missions' "First Year Missionary" program in South Africa/Swaziland. She will spend nine months with a team in southern Africa experiencing intentional discipleship in ministry and missions.

As part of the preparation process, AIM sets up each participant with their own blog site and gives them specific assignments to complete before the trip begins. Once on the field, the participants use their blogs to keep friends and supporters updated with prayer requests, stories and pictures.

You can visit Molly's site here. She has already blogged about her expectations of the trip, her calling to missions, and the reality of life for orphans in Swaziland.

Here's a snippet from her bio:

I have felt for the past couple years that God might be calling me to Africa, and more specifically He has begun to break my heart for Swaziland. When I found the First Year Missionary Program, I learned that I could serve in Swaziland and be mentored into my future in missions. This program was exactly what I had been looking for. So now, I have begun the journey and look forward to what God has for me next.

Please feel free to visit Molly's blog and leave a comment of encouragement!

The Year in Pictures: 2008

2008-12-30T16:24:00.000-08:00

January

When our JHers left the classroom and made a real difference in our neighbors' lives, they made "Love Your Neighbor" one of the best Sunday School classes we've ever done.

February

Oh Pizza Pucks, how I miss you. I'm so glad I got to enjoy you one last time, before the last shop that sells you closed its doors. Without you, the world seems a little sadder.

March

These five girls on my New Orleans team learned valuable lessons over the spring break mission trip about love, community, support, and prayer. They inspire me, and I am still learning from them.

April

It took us a while, but we finally found "our place" in the area: Napa Valley. Close enough for a day trip, but far enough away to feel like a whole different world. This picture is the garden at Copia (they actually use ingredients from their garden for the food in their restaurant!) I can't wait to get back!

May

We enjoyed our first camping trip with the Bonus; showing off our favorite sights in Yosemite as well as exhaustedly scrambling to the top of Yosemite Falls, one of the ten highest in the world (this pic is proof we made it to the top!).

June

We cheered on Molly as she crossed the stage at graduation. Two weeks later we cheered as she crossed a hospital room on her own two legs; praising God for the miraculous recovery from a (temporarily) paralyzing fall.

July

After 2 1/2 years of prayer, God blessed us by allowing us to bring a team back to work with our Guatemalan family in Lake Atitlan. (and yes, that's Molly right there with us!)

August

We were thrilled to join our friends the Berrys for a weekend getaway to a cabin in Lake Tahoe. One of my favorite parts of that trip was this hike down to Emerald Bay.

September

I tried my hand at wedding photography, and though I found it more challenging than expected, I really enjoyed the day. I'm so glad I could support my friends by helping them to capture special memories!

October

October saw the return of one of our favorite annual traditions: candy poker night!

November

As part of our annual 30 Hour Famine event, our students not only raised $3000 to send to World Vision, but gathered 200 pounds of food for the Monument Crisis Center, a local food bank.

December

Fellowship means celebration: here we are enjoying a Christmas party with the small group we joined last September. We've been so blessed by the friendships of these other young couples over the past three months.

As I look back over the highlights of these past twelve months, it's easy to see certain themes emerge: ministry, travel, and friends. I am so grateful to God for all the gifts and opportunities He's given me. I am thankful for the special people who have brought joy and meaning into my life. And I look ahead with wonder, with anticipation for what God will bring my way in 2009.

Reading the Good Book

2008-12-16T09:11:00.001-08:00

With the end of the year in sight, I have been reinvigorated to finish my "through the Bible in a year (or 3)" plan.

I started in Genesis in January 2006, and have been working my way from left to right, cover to cover, with the desire to read and understand the entirety of God's word in context.

I've taken breaks here and there to move around and study a topic in greater detail, or meditate on scriptures relating to life events, but I always come back to the silk ribbon and renew its progress.

The cover to cover method has been valuable for me to spend time in scripture passages that I may not have come across through a sermon or a devotional. I like knowing that I've read everything in the Bible (hmm, if only I could remember everything I've read!).

This will be the second time I've completed the reading from cover to cover. The first time through, I read the NIV Life Application commentary alongside the relevant scriptures, which also took me three years (I enjoyed the extra information, but ultimately found that the extra weight of the Bible discouraged me from taking it with me anywhere).

So, how shall I spend my daily quiet times in January 2009? I've got a couple different options in mind.

One is the "One Year Bible", which is based on the idea of (surprise) reading through the entire Bible in a year. What I like about this Bible, is that it automatically divies up the reading for each day, so that instead of reading a huge chunk in one place, you read a bit from the Old Testament, a bit from the new, and a Psalm (Hopefully this would keep me from getting bogged down in long passages of similar content).

Another option is a topical daily devotional. Yet another would be to do an in-depth study of Romans, and pick something else once I'm done with that. Ultimately, my goal is to continue learning about God's will in my life through His word, and to grow in obedience and maturity.

How do you choose your Bible devotional / study material? Do you follow some sort of a plan, or the pick and flip method?

It's a Wonderful Life

2008-12-06T15:36:00.000-08:00

I'm so excited to see our very own Lauren Galvin starring in "It's a Wonderful Life", presented by Contra Costa Christian Theatre.

The show will run Dec. 12-21 at the Del Valle Theatre in Walnut Creek.

You can get your tickets here.

A Family Thanksgiving Photo-Blog

2008-12-04T06:00:00.000-08:00

What makes for a great Thanksgiving weekend?

A pretty table

A thankful heart

Time with my Hubby

High School Buddies

Sweethearts

A Minnesotan's first-time trip to In'N'Out

Laughter

Steaming hot apple cider

My parents

Pie

A real Christmas tree

Watching USC trample Notre Dame

Preachin'

Color!

My hubby's family

Thanks to God for these special memories!

Max's Thoughts on World Hunger and Poverty

2008-12-03T06:00:00.000-08:00

The following is a note from one of our students, a young man in the 10th grade named Max. He is being challenged to really live out his faith in a meaningful way. This is exactly why we do things like the 30 Hour Famine:

So recently (as in since the 30 hour famine at my church), I've been thinking a lot about world hunger and poverty. I feel like I'm finally beginning to comprehend what's really going on everywhere in the world...except here. Because like every year when we're preparing for the 30 hour famine, we just hear over and over "kids die every day of hunger" and "other countries are divided into classes and it's so unfair" and stuff like that. But for some reason, it has really made me think a lot recently.

Like it's just so hypocritical how I can stuff myself on Thanksgiving and say I'm a Christian. Aren't we as Christians supposed to feed the hungry, not just live in our bubble to please ourselves? And I'm just satisfying myself and going beyond what I need in order to be full just because I can. And like every day, I'll look through the cupboards for something to eat, and I'm not even hungry. And whatever I see I usually turn down because "I don't feel like having it right now". If people in, I don't know, Swaziland had all the variety that I had, they would be ecstatic. I just take it all for granted.

And grocery stores. I don't think I realize that I have so much because I'm so used to it. Do I ever wonder when my next meal will come? Do I ever question if the grocery store will be out of food next time I go there?

26,000 children die each day of hunger. That's a child dying every 3 seconds 24/7. And that doesnt't include adults or teenagers. How can I not be thinking about that constantly? Why am I not weeping for those children? Why don't I do something about it?

And just watching television disgusts me. There are all these advertisements for cars and crap like that. So many people around the world couldn't afford that no matter how they tried. And I'm worried that I won't be able to use one of our two cars when I get my license.

And I never wonder how we're going to pay for all our expenses. I know that the money comes from the two and a half solid jobs that my parents have. And we have tons of money leftover for so much extra. What do we mean when we say "money will be tight this month"? We can't go out to eat for a month? So many people around the world live on an incredible amount less than us. What if we just cut some more stuff out? It's so unfair how children in Africa have to go work in the fields at the age of 5. And many girls become prostitutes at 8 or 9 just so they can make money to live. Then that just helps spread HIV.

Then I start thinking: Why was I born in America, the richest country ever? It was only by chance that I happened to be born here. Only 300 million people live here. There were like 200 other countries I could have been born into. I don't think I realize how lucky I am.

So I encourage you guys to think about and pray for the rest of the world. Because we DO live in a big, sheltered bubble. And there's so much bad stuff that we don't even know about in the rest of the world. Realize that we are very blessed indeed and that God will expect us to use the situations he's given us to feed the hungry, clothe the naked, and tell others about Jesus.

30 Hour Famine Report

2008-12-02T14:21:00.000-08:00

As reported in the Oakleaf:

Two weeks ago, 45 junior high and high school students went without food for 30 hours to raise money to fight world hunger, and to fast and pray on behalf of the hungry. During the fast, students engaged in service projects, played games, worshipped through song, and even got in some ballroom dancing!

Including the individual donations collected by students, the Sunday bake sale ran by our junior highers, and the "Get Off My Lawn" fundraiser our high school students came up with, Fair Oaks students raised approximately $2000 that will go to World Vision, the foremost Christian relief agency in the world today.

Our primary service project was a trip to Love-A-Child, a shelter for homeless women and their children in Bay Point. We piled out of our van caravan and were immediately put to work. Within minutes, kids were mixing concrete, painting walls, consolidating and stacking ceramic tiles, and shoveling gravel. Students also cooked and served lunch to the ladies and their kids, all while not eating themselves.

In the latter hours of the fast, students went out into the neighborhood surrounding the church in teams to collect food donations for the Monument Crisis Center. In little over an hour, they gathered three huge boxes full of food.

Students broke the fast with a feast of marinated chicken, tortillas, beans and rice.

Special thanks are due to the many adults who supported our students through donations, prayer, and volunteering their time during our 30 Hour Famine event.

FREE Concert this Sunday!

2008-11-21T16:36:00.000-08:00

Looking for something to do this weekend?

There's going to be a FREE concert at Fair Oaks Church on the evening of Sunday Nov. 23rd.

The ambassador choir from Multnomah University will be presenting "Worship Through the Psalms", and is visiting Fair Oaks as part of their tour.

Click here for more information.

(Did I mention it was FREE???)

God Loves the Predators... Could You?

2008-11-14T15:10:00.000-08:00

A phenomenal post by World Racer Kim Daniels, about her encounter with a man in a Thai strip bar.

Kind of like something shifted in me the night we got held at gunpoint in Johannesburg, South Africa, something shifted in me the night I found myself on the rooftop in Phnom Phen, Cambodia yelling freedom over the city with my brother Matt. Most of our squad is in Cambodia working in the slums, but 8 of us are back in Bangkok, Thailand for the next 7 days... back in the bars.

The World Race ends for me on November 21st. Just when I thought I was near done... nope! We're going to pump it up a notch at the end of this thing here. No fizzling out. The word 'autopilot' means nothing.

Its hard to describe what it was like being back in the Nana Entertainment district again, except to say that I knew I need to be there. Not just last night. Not just tonight and tomorrow night. But in the future. As I sat sipping my water, God told me, "Kim, you belong in the strip bars."

He made me smirk at that one. I like it: I work for Jesus in the strip bars.

We went back to Nana for the first time since GATO left Thailand 2 months ago. I'd felt intense all day, and it culminated especially as I stepped out of the taxi and laid eyes once more on the chaos of the downtown scene. The lights. The pounding music. The men. The women. The beer. The smell...

Once I get into intense mode, it takes the jaws of life to pry me out. I wanted to just get in there. I walked fast, fiercely praying through the downtown streets, blessing little kids and speaking limbs into cripples. I tend to feel the physical weight of spiritual atmospheres; it manifests itself in extreme aches in my body, headaches, nausea, stomach issues, etc etc. Over the last couple of months I've recognized it as hell's pathetic ploy to keep me at home. So whatever. I say no to hell. "Hell, no."

Caroline, Andi, Matt S, Mark, Gretchen, Patrice and I split into smaller groups and headed into the 3 story entertainment center, which read "Nana Entertainme". The 'nt' had burnt out. Caroline, Andi and I went into a bar on the 2nd floor that was hidden behind a green curtain.

As we sat inside, drinking our waters, a random man named Lonny (that's what we'll call him) came in and sat down. After about 3 minutes of trying to hit on me, he realized that getting hit on was not what I was in this bar for and started to ask some different questions and listen to mine. We talked for about an hour.

His was a classic story: He'd come with his two friends from Australia to Thailand to 'do what the Thai people do' after his 3 year relationship with his girlfriend had ended. Basically, he was here because he was angry, felt rejected, and was in the mood to dehumanize others and make them feel worthless because he felt dehumanized and worthless himself. Behind me were Andi and Caroline, praying. Behind him were his two buddies, making out with the almost naked women.

He asked why I was in Bangkok. I said, "Those girls up there", motioning with my head and turning my eyes to the girls on the poles. He followed my gaze and looked back at me. "Those girls are somebody's sister. Somebody's mom. Somebody's daughter. No matter how they ended up here, none of them are too far gone. Basically, I want then to know that they CAN get out. And if they won't yet, I at least want to tell them that their intrinsic value has nothing to do with their outward beauty or how much men will pay to sleep with them. Most of these women have never ever heard that in their life."

He played along with that for a while, saying things to make me think he agreed. I saw that he hadn't let it hit him yet, so we kept talking. I asked him, "So, Lonny, can I ask you a question?" With his yes, I said, "If you really think all those things about the girls- how sad it is that they are doing this, and how you don't think it's right- then what are you doing here?"

He looked down at his beer bottle, smiled and nodded his head as if to say, "You caught me." He said, "I'm here with my buddies. They know I don't agree, but I didn't want to be alone, so I came. And I have a pretty screwed up life, ya know Kim. Probably nothing like your's. I've been really depressed and almost killed myself a few times. I've lost the love of my life and lots of my close friends and family have died. I've had near death experiences, and have been on and off of all kinds of drugs for years. I bet you don't know very much about that."

I smiled. "Actually, Lonny, I know about all that. Our circumstances are different and I won't ever assume to know exactly what your life has been like. But I do understand depression. I was in it deep and heavy for years, and I understand the suicidal thoughts that go along with it. I get death-- my dad died suddenly of a heart attack and I've had quite a few friends die in the war and in freak accidents. I get loosing the "love of your life", and how excruciating that can be. I've been held at gunpoint; that's a near death experience if I ever heard one. And the drugs, well, I've never done pot or coke or smoked, but I was on anti-depressants for so long that it began to alter my personality. There are whole chunks of my life that I don't remember because of those doctor prescribed drugs. But your illegal drugs and my legal ones both have the same origin: using human re-doubled efforts to feel better, or to numb pain. Neither one of those ever works."

His eyes were glued on me. He said, "What are you really doing here?"

I told him about my Hero, who said that you have to loose your life in order to find it. And so I left everything behind, gave Him my life, keep giving Him more of it, and apparently it's led me all around the world.*

He told me about his Catholic background, and how it just never really worked for him and he couldn't figure out why. I asked him if he ever felt boxed in, like there were a bunch rigid standards that he could just never live up to, a list of do's and don'ts that he was supposed to keep and always found himself missing the mark. He said yes, and so his response to it all was "Forget it. I can't measure up anyways" and concluded that he was just a bad person and that God was really angry at him.

The law had brought him death.

He told me that he hated religion. And I told him that I hate religion, too. His eyebrows raised... "Wait, I thought you are a Christian..."

"I am," I answered. "But I'm not about religion. Religion sucks the life out of me and makes me want to whither and die. I'm not about a system that tells me how to live a nice life. I'm about the God who raises the dead and still makes all things new, who is also the same God that doesn't judge me on my performance or love me with condition."

That's when he broke. I watched his eyes change. They softened and then deepened, and he looked really vulnerable all of a sudden, like someone had just exposed his child-like innocence from a facade of pseudo-man pretending to be tough and calloused.

"What do you see when you step inside of Nana, Kim?"

"I see the Matrix. We're in the Matrix. Have you seen that movie?" He nodded. "Everything we see right now is not the real world. I can touch this wall, and I'm sitting on this stool, but these tangibles are not the reality of what is really going on in this bar. I've taken the red pill, and now I'm so deep into the truth of reality that I can never go back. What I see going on here is a battle for these girls' souls, and for the men's souls, too. There are lies here, accusations, greed, depression, hopelessness, lust, all things manufactured by hell. But there is also Light, and Life, perfection and beauty, restoration, hope, truth, and freedom. What I see when I step inside of Nana is it drying up. I see it not existing. I see the whole strip-bar scene going back to hell where it came from and Nana becoming a place that reflects the Kingdom of God, on earth as it is in heaven."

His eyes kept softening. "...I want what you have. If I could have whatever this is, I'd scoop it up with both hands so quick..."

"Hey, good news then. Its for you..." I said. "Jesus is especially fond of you..."**

I saw that facade begin to whither, but then something like a black sheet dropped over head. He stood up all of a sudden and got really flustered. I was surprised at how abrupt it was... He said, "Okay, um, I don't know what this is", motioning to his chest and stomach area, "I don't know whats going on, but its really unfamiliar, and... I just need to go. I'm just going to go."

I saw the discomfort in him... I saw that he'd been stirred and it freaked him out. But I smiled, thinking Oh, boy, God met you in the bar tonight. You came for sex and left recognizing your hunger for Someone else... You're much closer than you think... "Okay" I said. "Wherever you go, look for truth. Real truth, Lonny. And don't settle until you find It."
I watched him walk away quickly, his head down, oblivious to the girls all around him. I knew that God had gotten a little too close for his comfort zone.

That's part of my dream for Thailand. It's not just for the bar girls, it's for the men here, too. That they would travel halfway around the world thinking that they'll dive deep into pleasure and ignore the pain that drives them here... but instead of meeting girls for sex in the bars, they meet God instead. Because God's Kingdom invaded the bars incognito, and they didn't even see it coming. And in the very place that they thought they'd play Jonah to keep running from Him, they crash into Him.

~~~
*Quote from Matt Snyder's mind
**"The Shack". A must read.

30 Hour Famine Fundraisers

2008-11-12T11:16:00.000-08:00

30 Hour Famine is an annual event sponsored by World Vision, with the goal of raising awareness and money to fight world hunger.

Last year was the first time the Fair Oaks youth group did the famine, and I am thrilled to report that our youth have caught the vision!

We already have about 40 youth signed up to participate, and they are preparing for this weekend's 30 hour event by planning their own fundraisers.

The junior highers put together and ran their own bakesale, selling off freshly baked cookies, brownies, and pies, with all donations going to World Vision. All credit goes to Spencer, an 8th grader who came up with the idea, then organized everyone involved! (I found out later that this may have been the very 1st bakesale in Fair Oaks Church history!)

The high schoolers came up with their own creative idea: taking over people's lawns! For donations, you can send a group of fun-loving teenagers to hang out on your friend's lawn! Or, for a donation, you can purchase insurance to keep said teenagers OFF your lawn!

I had no idea what the response would be to this idea, but our whole church has really gotten a kick out of it, and much has been raised towards our cause.

I look forward to reporting back next week how much our group has raised!

Happy Birthday to Me!

2008-11-10T16:31:00.000-08:00

Last Friday, I was blessed to celebrate my birthday with family and friends. (I was relieved to find three-one much less traumatic than last year's farewell to my twenties. Phew!)

I woke up to the sound of my parents leaving me a birthday message on my answering machine (they were headed out of town); and though I didn't get to speak with them directly, it was a good way to start the day.

Friday evening, our church small group had made plans to get together for pizza and games, so we had a fun night of hanging out and getting to know one another better (and while I was celebrated, it wasn't all about me - which was good).

Molly gave me a copy of a book I'd read once and loved, The Narrow Road by Brother Andrew. I recall being so inspired, that I can't wait to read it again. Gary gave me a bible study on the book of Romans that I'd asked for.

These were thoughtful gifts, but the real celebration came Saturday evening, when Gary and Molly combined forces to take over the kitchen and prepare me a special dinner! This was special and significant for me, due to the rarity of the occasion. Prior to this night, Gary has cooked for me twice - and one of those was because he had lost a bet!

Despite the lack of experience, Gary and Molly did an incredible job putting together a gourmet pasta dish with roasted turkey and sun-dried tomatoes (does that sound like a weird combination? I thought it did, but it tastes amazing!).

I feel so blessed and honored to have friends like these in my life, who give me the best gifts of all - love, laughter, and great food! Thanks, guys!

Pilot Lands Plane After Losing Sight

2008-11-08T08:31:00.000-08:00

This story is amazing: a pilot in Britain lost his sight while flying due to a stroke, and was talked down into a safe landing. Unbelievable.

Art Imitating Life...

2008-11-05T20:39:00.000-08:00

Tuesday night, we started a new lesson series with our junior highers on the book of Psalms. Gary kicked it off with an unusual exercise designed to get the kids thinking about their own own experiences and emotions and how they might relate those to others (as the Psalms are extremely honest and passionate).

He instructed them to spend approximately eight minutes drawing a picture that represents their life. With junior highers, it would be impossible to guess what this challenge might produce. How can anyone, really, sum up their life in eight minutes on one sheet of paper?

When Gary called time, I walked around the room and was blown away by our kids' ability to capture their lives - a snapshot, if you will, of the middle school experience. If any of you out there have junior highers, or work in junior high ministry, I am sure you will appreciate these as much as I did:

Do any of these remind you of your own junior high years?

Faithful in the Waiting

2008-11-02T13:49:00.000-08:00

So often, I think of my own obedience to God in terms of DOING His will, SERVING Him, ACCOMPLISHING great things for His Kingdom. And, it's just so easy to judge others by what I SEE happening in their lives.

It's in our nature, isn't it, to focus on outer things? It's why we have the cliche "to judge a book by its cover"; it's why Jesus accused the Pharisees of being "white-washed tombs".

But I've found myself in an unfamiliar season of my faith: NOT doing (at least, in my own perspective). I suppose I had a sense of anticipation for this, when I blogged this a couple months ago:

"... I sense that my role in youth ministry is going to have to be more defined and less all-encompassing than it has been in the past. I dread the moments when I am going to have to, at some point, say NO to myself, my students, and worst of all, to my husband. But I don't see a way around that if I'm going to keep myself and my marriage healthy for the long term."

As I prayerfully sought God's direction on my commitments for the year, I was more than a little confused when His overwhelmingly direct response was simply, "WAIT!".

"Wait"? What do you mean by that, God? Shouldn't I be, like, doing something for You? What exactly, am I waiting for?

But, the clarity of this instruction, and the peace that encompassed it, have subdued the questions that have sprung up within me.

So, I'm attempting to teach myself a new way of thinking. I'm reminding myself that I'm just as valuable to God even when I'm not teaching a Bible Study or planning a mission trip. (Oooh, how that irks my productivity-oriented nature!) I am seeking to diligently and patiently listen for His voice. I am making myself more available. To God, to others. I'm trying to not try so hard.

Because, to God, our hearts are even more important than our actions. And my obedience to His instruction to WAIT is more valuable right now than all the self-satisfying things I could come up with to do in His name.

Ultimately, my desire must not be for specific deeds or accomplishments in my life, but faithfulness to my Lord. Even when all He asks me to do is wait.

The Politics of Poverty

2008-10-30T09:45:00.000-07:00

This kind of stuff frustrates me to no end...

Mbabane

The irony is not lost on Swazis: the population is among the world's poorest, and yet the kingdom is classified as a "middle-income country". How come?

According to Musinga Timothy Bandora, resident coordinator of the UN Development Programme (UNDP), "A nation's wealth is measured by several factors; this includes gross national product." In the case of Swaziland, ruled by sub-Saharan Africa's last absolute monarch, if the nation's wealth were equally distributed, each Swazi would receive US$100,000.

In per capita income terms, Swaziland ranks somewhere between Armenia and Paraguay, with export earnings based on agriculture and textiles; but, in terms of the share of the national wealth, the richest 10 percent of Swazis control over 50 percent of the country's income, a level of inequality worse than in Brazil or South Africa, and beaten only by Namibia.

"Swaziland isn't a poor nation when you measure its gross domestic product; the problem is that the wealth is being siphoned off by a few people, with the king and the royal family top of the tree. What's left, and it isn't much, goes to the people," said Richard Rooney, associate professor of Journalism and Mass Communication at the University of Swaziland.

UNDP figures show that about 70 percent of Swazis live in chronic poverty. A record 60 percent of the population relied on food assistance from the World Food Programme and other aid groups in the past year due to drought, and the country has the world's highest HIV prevalence rate.

The Coordinating Assembly of Non-Governmental Organisations (CANGO), has expressed concern that Swaziland's classification as a middle-income country - despite the desperate need of its people - hinders fund raising for development projects.

"It is not fair that poor people be denied aid because Swaziland is so small that a handful of super-rich skew the income demographics to make the country look richer than it is."

Timbali Crafts

2008-10-29T17:48:00.000-07:00

When I traveled to Swaziland in November of 2006, I was blessed to stay with missionary Julie Anderson and see her ministry first-hand. She has launched a website to promote the craft co-op that she runs; anyone can now order the fabric purses that Swazi women make to support themselves. The co-op is a great group that is making a real difference in the lives of women and children in Swaziland. For more info about the country and this ministry, read below or click the link here.

(fyi, Swaziland is the country Molly will be ministering in on her nine-month mission trip)

Swaziland is a small country in Southern Africa.
Over 40% of the population is HIV positive, there
are more than 120,000 orphans, and the life
expectancy for women is the lowest in the world, at
only 33 years.

Around the country, feeding centers have been
created to help provide regular meals for the many
orphans who lack proper care. The majority of
these care points are run by women, who
themselves are also facing many hardships as the
result of the HIV/AIDS crisis.

Timbali Crafts was started in 2006 to help
generate an income for the 45+ women who work
as volunteer cooks at the eight feeding centers in
the rural area of Engculwini. Crafts sales allow the
women to earn an income for their families, and
also continue on with their volunteer work, which is
vital to their community.

Timbali Crafts also seeks to reach out to the
spiritual needs of the women, through regular
Bible studies, retreats and special events.

As Timbali Crafts continues to grow, even more
women in Swaziland will be able to become
involved in this income generating opportunity,
and further outreach to underprivileged women will
be funded.

Timbali Crafts is directed by Julie Anderson,
missionary with Adventures In Missions.

You Know You Grew up in Simi Valley When...

2008-10-27T15:38:00.000-07:00

I think we've all seen those e-mail forwards titled "You know you grew up in the 80's when..."; well, thanks to Facebook I've stumbled upon "You know you grew up in Simi Valley when...", an ode to my childhood hometown. Awesome!

I've highlighted the ones that particularly stand out to me. I'll probably be thinking of things to add to this list all the rest of this week! But, for now:

1. You remember when Sycamore Plaza was the "cool" place to hang out.

2. You remember when The Regal replaced Sycamore Plaza as the cool place to hang out.

3. You can go anywhere in Simi and run into at least five people you know.

4. You have friends or you yourself live in a gated community.

5. Going to the beach is considered a local trip.

6. You remember complaining about having to go all the way to Northridge to shop at the mall.

7. It was a very exciting day when Simi Opened it's own mall.

8. You have had a pass to Oakridge Health Club at one point in your life.

9. At least one of your friends or you yourself live in Indian Hills

10. Each of the 20 Starbucks is one of the local hot spots (nah, I was part of the Denny's crowd...)

11. Your friends or bf/gf has hung a banner over the side of the 118 to wish you a happy birthday.

12. When you were a teenager your idea of a good night of partying was going to LA and using your fake I.D

13.You know about the monster rivalry between simi high and royal..... (yep, I almost didn't consider applying to USC because they had Simi colors...)

14. And you affectionately refer to santa susana magnet school as "the Fagnet school" (what? I never heard this. But Hollow Hills Fundamental was definitely "Hollow Heads Fun for the Mental")

15. All of your ex bf/gf know each other and are probably friends.

16.The people you were in kindergarten with were in your graduating class in high school.

17. Most people's idea of going to college means enrolling at moorpark.

18. you know that nicknames for moorpark include "harvard on the hill" and "Kraproom"

19. Going to "the arena" is like a high school reunion.

20. When you visit other cities and you see homes for sale "starting in the low 600's" you find yourself saying "whoa that's a great deal!"

21. You remember what a big deal it was back in the 80's when it snowed in simi. (Oh my gosh. It's still a big deal!)

22. You have a season pass to magic mountain and sometimes go Friday nights after the football game. (if there are no good parties going on)

23. In elementary school you went to the Ronald Regan Library for a class field trip cause the Reagan library is in our backyard.

24. Most people go to 24 hour fitness to check each other out and NOT actually workout.

25. When you remember the pumpkin patch on the corner of tapo canyon and alamo where borders bookstore is now.

26. And then you'd look across the street and see a huge field of orange trees instead of that police station.

27. When your childhood memories include attending the RINGling brother's circus where the regal plaza is now.

28. when you've been to easy street arena at least once to ice skate.

29. You remember getting all your friends together to go see a movie at the MANNS theatre for $2.

30. When you run into your teachers at restaurants, banks, markets, etc.

31. You thought PHAT FRIDAY(now Mayhem) was awesome.

32. You question why Santa Susana High School is a magnet school.

33. You remember the Drive in theater where the mobile home park is now by the run down K-mart, which used to be cool too.

34. You remember when more then just Simi and Royal marched the Simi Days Parade, and it was actually judged! (Oh, I loved performing in parades! Until I sprained my ankle in the Simi Days Parade my senior year...)

35. Ralphs was THE grocery store in Simi

36. Rancho Park was a GREAT place to play at.

37. Tapo Car Wash was the ONLY place you could sit inside your car while getting it washed.

38. Watching 4th of July Fireworks was only available on the side of the road or sitting on your parents' roof because the Santa Susanna Park hadn't been built yet.

39. Steer and Stein was a classy place to eat steaks at. (Haven't heard of it. But Tony Roma's, that was the place!)

40. You shopped at Gemco and Alpha Beta.

41. You've gotten really fast at packing up your car when fires approach.

Happy Halloween!

2008-10-26T06:00:00.000-07:00

As Halloween is just around the corner, here is a little inspiration to get those pooches ready for the big night:

ht: Simi Valley Jean

Cartoon of the Day

2008-10-25T17:32:00.000-07:00

This one had the whole fam-bam cracking up, thus, I must share it with you:

Mother Goose & Grimm

Congratulations, Pastor Antonio!

2008-10-24T10:53:00.000-07:00

I just got the word from Pastor Antonio in Guatemala that he and Cata have a new role: abuelos (grandparents)!!!

Their daughter Anita and her husband Aurelio have welcomed a new little girl into the world.

Please take a moment to speak a blessing over this family!

It's Not Theirs

2008-10-23T21:19:00.000-07:00

Excerpted from this post by Kim Daniels, a World Racer currently on the field in Thailand:

~She sells her body to make money to feed her child.
~4 people in the church of 100 own a Bible.
~She's sick and dying of AIDS. She has been sexually abused more times than she can count. She is 7. And cares for 4 younger siblings.
~He sleeps in the train station. Starving. While there are hundreds of very edible cows wandering on the streets. But he won't dare touch one... because he believes that cow might just be his uncle, father, or friend.
~Her husband was martyred last year, leaving 40 orphans in her care. Somehow, all 41 of them survive on $10 a day.

I've seen their faces.
I've looked into their eyes.
I heard the unique tones of each voice.
I've smelled their homes.
I've slept in their rat infested rooms.
I've held them as they've wept.
I've tasted the sourness of their food.
I've laid on the dirt under the stars, holding sick, dying orphans who don't speak a word of English, falling in love with them as their bright eyes smile up at me through dark skin.

So its real to me.

And over and over again, I try to innovate new ways to help them. Because over and over again, it reverberates in me: "This is not just THEIR problem."

When a part of my body isn't functioning right, it manifests itself, sometimes through a cough, a sneeze, or weakness. When something isn't in sync with the rest of my parts, we'd say that I'm sick, and begin to do what needs to be done to get me healthy. If my lungs, stomach, or head suffer, the rest of me suffers, too....

When a part of the Body of Christ isn't functioning right, the rest of the Body suffers. When we who CAN do something do nothing, it affects everyone, even though you might not see it externally... eventually, what's going on internally will manifest on the surface.

Their conditions are not just their problem. And I'm not just talking about physical conditions. I'm talking about emotional and spiritual as well. Far too often we all walk around in a cloud of self-consumption, saturated in our present level of depression or happiness, the price of gas and the economy, our relationship issues, or any other situation we can keep our minds busy with.

And we miss the big picture. Starving children in Mozambique aren't actors in a Compassion International infomercial. They really do exist. I've held their boney frames. Women enslaved by the sex trade aren't statics. I've seen the emptiness in their eyes, and heard their unspoken cries for a Friend.

You know you're awake because you want to wake everyone else up, too.
If you don't want to, then maybe you're still sleeping.
Maybe you need to walk straight into something uncomfortable. Something you don't understand. Something that even frightens you a bit.
Until you do, the real world keeps passing you by, while you live in the Matrix.
True, waking up requires much more effort. But I promise you, its worth every tear, drop of sweat, and question that keeps you up at night.

Feeding starving orphans is not just the orphan's problem. Loving the love-starved is not just the love-starved's problem.

And waking sleeping people up is not just the sleeping people's problem.
I've decided its mine, too.

What's a Follower?

2008-10-22T15:11:00.000-07:00

A couple of days ago, I added a new gadget to the bar on the right side of this page, called "Followers".

According to Blogger, "The feature lets readers publicly subscribe to your blog (so you know who's reading) and adds a Reading List to your Blogger Dashboard so readers can stay updated with the blogs they follow."

This is a convenient way to keep up with the blogs that I follow as they are updated.

Also, this feature allows myself and other readers to connect to other bloggers who follow Feed My Sheep (and yes, I'd really like to know who you are!).

So, Youth-Leader-Lady, welcome! You're my first official follower. And to you other bloggers out there, join up so I can be connected to you as well!

Thanks!

Let me pose a question...

2008-10-20T09:24:00.000-07:00

When it comes to serving in your church or your community, what factors make it easier or harder for you to get involved?

What specific things is your church doing (or do you think they should be doing) to facilitate your involvement in ministry?

Bringing it All Home

2008-10-17T10:59:00.000-07:00

What I'm taking home with me from this year's National Youth Worker's Convention:

Starfield song: Reign in Us

Starfield led worship for two days at the convention, and I was greatly blessed by a new song called Reign in Us. I had to buy their cd I Will Go at the convention, and have been playing it nonstop. Not only that, but Gary looked online and found lyrics and chords. So... we're learning to play it! Yay!

Oh great and mighty one, with one desire we come,
That you would reign, that you would reign in us,
We're offering up our lives, a living sacrifice,
That you would reign, that you would reign in us

Mark Yaconelli: Slow Club

During one of the general sessions, Mark talked about how his (four year old) son had invented, and was thereby president of, a 'slow club'. This club has two rules: No hurrying, and no running.

Though Mark was endlessly aggravated by the amount of time it took to get his son to pre-school in the morning, he was convicted when his son finally convinced him to join the slow club for a day. Mark was amazed at how much he was able to notice and respond to once he had slowed down his ingrained busyness.

Well, you don't need to twist my arm. I'm all about the slow club! And I often wonder what life would be like if our friends and family and neighbors joined the slow club too... I think we would be a lot less stressed out, and a lot friendlier. Any other slow clubbers out there?

Shane Claiborne: Are you a Christian?

I was blessed to have the opportunity to hear Shane speak twice over the weekend. Both times he challenged us with the passage of scripture where John the Baptist's disciples go to Jesus to ask if he is indeed the awaited Messiah. It would have been very easy for Jesus, at that time, to answer with a straightforward "Yup".

But, he didn't. He instructs them, rather, to go back to JtB and 'report what you have seen and heard'. Meaning, Jesus' actions were sufficient to define his identity.

Shane put the question to us then, "If someone asks if you are a Christian, are you able to turn the question back to them and say, 'tell me what you see'? Can we confidently say, 'Ask the poor if I'm a Christian. Ask my enemies.'"? Will our identity be confirmed by our actions? Ooh, this question gives me goosebumps.

Genesis Diez: Possible Mission Trip Opportunity

During my sojourn through the endless exhibit hall (I never made it all the way through), I encountered a friendly couple who live in Mexico and facilitate short-term teams to come work with needy kids. I've been keeping my eyes open for a good opportunity for the families in our church to serve together, and I found that this may be the perfect kind of project for us.

During the summer, the Genesis ranch in Ensenada invites orphanages to bring their kids for a one-week summer camp. Volunteers come in to help run the camp, and each volunteer is assigned one or two 'amigos' that they bond with over the course of the week. It sounds like a very relational ministry, with opportunities for all ages to participate. I hope that this, or something like this, will work out for our church for next summer.

Stone and Water: Releasing the Burden of Personal Responsibility

Probably the most important time for me during this convention was my stop in the prayer room. On the first day, I was making the mad dash to my session when I ended up in a quiet, darkened room full of prayer stations. I had the wrong room number in mind - I think God was just trying to get my attention before I went running into another session. So of course, I had to stop and pray before I moved on.

I went to a prayer station that involved a table covered with stones and a large bucket of water. The instructions stated to pick up a stone, and pray about a burden you've been carrying. When you're ready, release the stone into the water, and prayerfully release your burden unto the Lord.

Though I was feeling a significant amount of emotional weight, it took me quite a while to identify the burden that I was carrying. Finally, as I prayed, I began to see how much pressure I've been putting on myself. Pressure to do good, get it right, be a good example, save the world. I love the Lord so much, but serving Him should not bring this much stress!

I realized that I need to release the burden of my sense of personal responsibility. Not give up being responsible, but to relax and enjoy the freedom and joy available in this life. Ugh, that just feels so unspiritual to me! But being spiritual sometimes means trusting God to direct your steps. And perfect trust means no anxiety.

So, I took a breath, and let the stone slip from my hand. It sank quickly to the bottom of the water, and I stared at it for a few moments. Then, I turned around, and peacefully strolled out of the room with a smile on my face and lightness in my heart.

My Closure to the World Race

2008-10-17T06:00:00.000-07:00

Friday afternoon, immediately after the general session at the NYWC in Sacramento, we headed to our separate 'break out' classes. I was thrilled to see that Seth Barnes of Adventures in Missions was in town to share about how "Your Students Can Start Changing the World... Now!".

I'd been looking forward to this session since I'd heard Seth was presenting: for the past three years, he's been a major influence in my life.

In 2005, Gary and I took our youth group to Tijuana for a week-long mission trip with AIM. As part of our preparation, we got a copy of Seth's devotional: "The Art of Listening Prayer". This was the first I'd even considered that prayer could include God speaking to me, and reading that book was nothing short of revolutionary for my spiritual life.

Towards the end of 2005, Adventures in Missions offered a new program called the World Race, and Gary and I felt called to participate in this year-long mission trip. During our team orientation, I finally got to meet Seth (the World Race was his vision and project), and was touched by his ability to listen and connect, even while responding to numerous demands.

When we began our trip, we encountered the various twists and turns that accompany any first time venture. I was eager to debrief and process the experience with Seth first-hand, especially the more difficult and confusing times. Unfortunately, we were not able to reunite throughout the course of the trip, and though we've had some contact over the internet, I've been hopeful to someday sit down with him and just talk.

Well, my chance finally came. Seth noticed me in the middle of his session (I think I threw him for a bit of a loop when he was trying to present!), and took the opportunity to come check in with me during a discussion section. We ended up hanging out talking after everyone left, and Gary and I were able to join Seth and his wife Karen for dinner.

It was great to catch up with him, get to know his wife, and compare stories about what God has done over the past couple years. We talked about the craziness that was the first year of the World Race, what things have evolved over the past couple years as the program has developed, what life is like for us now as well as for other racers.

I had always imagined that this conversation would bring a huge sensation of closure to my World Race experiences. And reflecting back on it now, I think it did and it didn't.

We've been home from the mission field for almost two years now, and probably the whole first year was a journey of forgiveness for the many interpersonal hurts and betrayals we experienced. The second year has been much easier, less of trying to forget the bad, more of remembering the good. We've started to see the fruit of dreams that were born during our time on the Race. I have come to a point of feeling settled in my soul about the whole experience.

So now, in God's timing, we were finally able to sit down and just talk, without any expectations on my end of having to say anything to, or hear anything in particular from Seth. We could just meet each other where we were at and appreciate God's goodness throughout some wild times. And that's a pretty good way to wrap it all up.

Gary and I leaving on the World Race in 2006

Our New Small Group

2008-10-16T18:44:00.000-07:00

This past Monday, we wrapped up two weeks worth of traveling just in time for the kickoff of one of our church's brand new small groups.

I love the concept of small group - it provides a context for relationships and discipling not possible in 'big church'. Through the first adult small group that Gary and I ever participated in came our calling to youth ministry (a story I really need to blog on someday!). Unfortunately, due to scheduling issues we've had trouble getting plugged into one at Fair Oaks up to this point.

So, we were pretty stoked to get together Monday along with four other (OUR AGE!!!!!) couples. All groups will be kicking off this fall by going through Peter Scazzero's Emotionally Healthy Church Workbook.

The workbook is based on the book by the same name, which Gary and I read one year ago as part of the Retool Kit process. It proposes that emotional and spiritual maturity are linked, and that by evaluating and growing in our emotional maturity we will be able to overcome roadblocks to growing spiritually.

What struck me about our meeting this past Monday was an unusually high level of openness and authenticity, especially for a first meeting. (It helps that certain couples are friends with other couples in the group, but this is the first time we've all hung out together) This is a group of people who want to build good relationships and true community. I'm really excited for the potential of this group and to see where God leads us throughout the coming year.

Are you in a small group at your church? Why / why not? I invite you to leave a comment and share what factors have helped to build community within your group.

Pics by Katherine

2008-10-15T13:42:00.000-07:00

I'm trying out a new website created by Shutterfly to share my pictures in various albums.

They've given me a site at http://picsbykatherine.shutterfly.com/ where you can view or even order prints of pictures I've taken.

So far, I've loaded the albums:

-Berry Wedding Ceremony
-Lake Tahoe Vacation
-Guatemala Mission Trip

Hawaii pics, are unfortunately not yet loaded, but hopefully will be soon!

Come check it out and leave a comment if you like!

Portrait of a Disciple

2008-10-14T17:34:00.001-07:00

Discipleship is a huge passion of mine - I believe it's what our role in the Christian life is all about. About a year ago (to the day!), I posted this while imagining what modern discipleship could look like. I think y'all are due for an update.

I'll start with an excerpt from my post: "Late-night ramblings of a would-be disciple-maker"

Imagine…

if we chose to share a home with a disciple, intentionally sharing all aspects of our life with them? It would be costly… maybe we couldn't spend so much time at work, pouring into a career. Less time to spend on self-fulfilling hobbies. We’d have to develop our own faith, make it worthy of sharing. Maybe get a little flexible with the definitions of “mine” and “yours”.

What if...

over dinner, we dreamed together of what could happen in our church, our community? What if we shared our God-given passions and encouraged one another to follow them shamelessly? What if, over breakfast, we prayed and devoted ourselves to living out His call?

...The question is, are there people out there that would be interested in being the disciplee in such an intense relationship? If I (or anybody) actually offered this up, would there be any takers? I do believe there would be. Not everyone, sure, but a few. And those are the ones I want to pour into.

One year later, I'm proud to say that I took my own challenge. And every day I marvel at how God has blessed our family because of our openness.

Molly graduated from high school last June, and moved into our home immediately following our Guatemala mission trip in July (she was one of the partcipants). So, how's it been going?

Molly and I meet regularly to read God's word and pray together. No, we're not perfect at this, but we've seen great blessings come out of these times. And that's not it!

We sing praise songs together. We laugh (a lot). We challenge one another. We help her with her math homework (ok, that one's all Gary!). We discuss ministry, church, what Christian community could be. We make up silly songs. We dream about Africa, about caring for orphans in Swaziland. In essence, we're living shared life. "Doing life together", as I've heard some say.

Would this work for everyone? I think it depends. What makes it so successful here, I think, is Molly's desire to grow and to contribute. She is pursuing her relationship with God wholeheartedly, which is a beautiful thing to see in anyone.

God has placed in her a heart for missions, and has given her the incredible opportunity to serve as a First Year Missionary in Swaziland. She'll be leaving next September to serve a nine-month internship.

She will be a light in a dark place, ministering to the poor, caring for AIDS orphans, truly caring for the least of these. I am honored to be her prayer/accountability partner, supporting her from back home while she's on the field. I know that God will work through her in a mighty way, and I am humbled to be a part of it.

"The Fam-Bam"

NYWC Day #2

2008-10-12T00:48:00.000-07:00

This is gonna be a short one, but it's all I can manage before I fall asleep tonight:

Highlights of the day:

Sleeping in

Breakout with Shane Claiborne

Talking with missionaries to Mexico in the Exhibitor Hall

General Session with Mike Pilavachi

Comedy session with Nazareth and Ron McGehee

NYWC Day #1

2008-10-10T23:48:00.000-07:00

I'm sitting in my hotel room, ready for bed and settled in after a great first day at the National Youth Workers Convention in Sacramento.

This is the 6th time Gary and I have attended this convention, and it's always surprisingly refreshing to me how safe and free I feel alongside thousands of other youth workers. So, I come here seeking not just practical training, but spiritual refreshment in the arms of Jesus. Seriously, our joint times of worship are so sweet, I can't help but look forward to heaven.

A major highlight of the day was the exhortational teaching from Bishop Sherwood Carthen on the importance of a wilderness experience in the life of a leader. He referred to Matthew 4:1, which describes Jesus being led by the Spirit into the desert. Jesus' experience there in the desert was not easy: he was extremely hungry while fasting, and the devil showed up to tempt him mercilessly.

How many times do we ourselves experience times of need or frustration, and immediately look to place blame on God or feel sorry for ourselves? Perhaps, like in the life of Jesus, God wants to allow us to experience hard things to prepare us for the ministry he has in store for us ahead. Perhaps God is saying 'wait, I have better things waiting for you, trust me'.

Those of you who know me or have been following this blog are aware that I've been struggling with these feelings of frustration - I really felt challenged during Bishop Sherwood's teaching to obey that still, small voice saying "wait", to embrace brokenness, to trust God, that He has me right where I need to be right now. Only God can work through such a provocative challenge to bring peace.

Thank you, Lord.

Sacramento, Here We Come!

2008-10-10T10:17:00.000-07:00

After a wonderful week-long vacation with friends in Hawaii, we're doing a quick turnaround and heading back out to spend the weekend in Sacramento for the National Youth Workers Convention.

I'll be blogging from the convention, than plan to post about the Hawaii trip once we're back home, complete with pictures.

Kauai, here we come!

2008-10-01T06:00:00.000-07:00

In just a few short hours Matt, Bethany, Gary, and I are going to be here, a beautiful resort in Kauai!

For Matt & Bethany, this will be their belated honeymoon following last weekend's church ceremony. Gary and I will be trading our photo/videographer role for that of nanny, helping with baby Berry so our friends can fully enjoy their time in Hawaii. I have to say, it's easily the best babysitting job I've ever gotten!

This will be our first time visiting Hawaii, so I am very much looking forward to all that the islands have to offer. I don't know if I'll have access to or time for internet, so no promises on regular blogging for the next couple of weeks. I'm pretty sure that when I do, though, I'll return with plenty of breathtaking photos like these:

(these bottom two pics are of the resort we'll be staying at)

A Berry Special Wedding

2008-09-30T06:00:00.000-07:00

This past weekend, I had great fun trying out a new role: wedding photographer!

Our friends Matt & Bethany tied the knot one year ago in a civil ceremony, and for their one year anniversary decided to put on a 'renewal of the vows' ceremony at the church for all their family and friends.

Though I've never done anything like this, Bethany likes my photography enough to trust me with all the pictures of her special day. And who ended up doing the videography except my very own G-Dub - together, we composed the Weston Media Package.

It surprised me how intense the day was - I didn't want to risk missing a single moment! I ended up with about 600 pictures, and though I'm certainly not close to professional, I came out with a lot of pictures I'm sure they'll be happy with.

Here are some of my favorite pics: